The Life of a Rockstar

some late night musings....

2012-01-31T02:06:00.003-05:00

Coming close to 2 am....and yet I can't sleep yet. I have too much energy at the moment.

I've been thinking a lot lately about my life and where I'm heading. I have to admit, it's farther than I have been in the past few years, and yet I know that there's still a long way to go. The ideas are coming quicker, the ambition to be a writer returns with each word I write, the music in my soul gets louder, and my dreams seem reachable. (When have my dreams ever been this close? I can't remember.)

But I'm determined to make this year epic. The door is cracking open just a little and it's my job to push harder and open it all the way. I can't give up now. It's too close for me to turn around and walk away.

I'm grateful for where my life is heading. On the verge of a breakthrough and the surface has only been scratched.

Dream interviews, here I come.

Dream job, here I come.

Dream life....I'm already there.

~Jenny Rockstar

a little time to update and think....

2012-01-26T23:25:00.001-05:00

Definitely been a few days since I've thought about posting anything, but keeping busy is my goal. The writing bug has been taking over for my column as I continue to create my Grammy predictions, while another project has given me something fun to focus on.

So it's no secret that I love the band Bonnie Dune, even if I've only been able to catch the only East Coast show they've offered. But it got me (and another Twitter friend or two) thinking, especially when the Tour Manager shared how fans could help bring them here. So we knuckled down, researching information on any and every venue in NYC/NJ that would be great for the boys to check out.

Within the first day, we reached over 100 followers, as well as getting recognition from band members for our project. By the second day, we reached over 150 followers and even had our first venue showing interest.

But what I'm realizing more and more is that working on projects are about more than just accomplishing a goal. It's about getting the chance to meet new people and make new friends with individuals I may have never met if I didn't have these interests. So I'm grateful for all of it....and I'm going to keep pushing my dreams as far as they can go.

And on that note, I'm going to keep reaching as far as I can go. This year is really my year. It's going to be epic.

~Jenny Rockstar

A remake better than the original....at least I think so

2012-01-18T17:57:00.000-05:00

I normally never post videos on any blog I write....especially here. But last night, as I watched one of my favorite shows, Glee, this particular number came up. I had been hearing about this song for weeks and weeks, knowing that it was going to be a number performed by Rachel for Finn.

Just the arrangement of the performance, coupled with the emotion shown was enough to make me reach for several Kleenex. I know fans are very into this song right now, but I look at it as more than just a tear-jerker. It felt like in that moment, I could feel exactly what was happening....especially since I feel this way every single day and have for the past four years.

So there it is. I think you should watch it. Watch it with a box a Kleenex on hand and/or your love by your side (if you have one). Glee has truly stepped up their game with giving us this. And big props to Lea Michele and Cory Monteith for their part in this performance. The Finn/Rachel dynamic would not be the same without them being Finn & Rachel, or 'Finchel' for those superfans (like me!)

Alright, now back to my normal blogging rituals....but feeling just a little more love than usual.

~Jenny Rockstar

p.s. - I love you too....life would not be the same without you. <3

One Knock is Sometimes Enough....

2012-01-16T22:19:00.002-05:00

When many think of 'opportunity' in their life, it's automatically assumed that the chance received will always be right away. Some forget that hard work needs to be incorporated into the equation, while many others tend to overlook the small things that could lead to the bigger part.

While I was brainstorming over my upcoming columns, my editor approached me with a wonderful writing opportunity: an interview with a well-known Flamenco singer. At first, I will admit to feeling a little out of my element with the genre of music. But I figured, "why not" and accepted the writing challenge.

I know there are moments in life when we don't get to do the exact things we want, but many of us don't seem to remember that it is in those steps we take that the goal can be reached. Sometimes we take on tasks that seem completely different from the original path....and the results surprise us in ways none of us thought possible.

That's the thing about opportunity: you don't know where or when it will knock....you just need to be prepared to open the door when it comes. And at 28, I've finally heard the knock.

Let's hope this door leads me somewhere great.

~Jenny Rockstar

droppin' some knowledge....Jenny style

2012-01-15T22:50:00.000-05:00

Whenever I go out to one of Matt's shows, I am always amused. Whether it be the various dancers that head out to the floor after a few drinks have been downed, dirty looks from girls who think they have a chance with my man, or even the men that attempt to hit on me as I'm trying to enjoy a relaxing night with my girls; this is focused on the latter.

It doesn't seem to matter where or when it happens....on a night out where I hang out with my girls, men always seem to try and interrupt with drunken charm coupled with a need to get pretty girls up and dancing. The truth of the matter is, I dance every other time I'm out, so why do I need to get up now?

The first time they walk away, I just shrug it off and go back to talking with my friends. By the second time I'm curious to their motivation, as I've clearly demonstrated that I'm not interested. But by the third time, it's just downright annoying. So in an effort to add a little bit of humor to the situation, here's a little something for the boys:

Dear Drunken Male Bar Patron Hitting on Me:

I know you think I'm cute and would love nothing more than for me to grace you with my sweet dancing moves. Of course, if you could word your slurring phrases in this fashion instead of making me feel like it's "wrong" for me to be sitting & enjoying the music....I wouldn't have to laugh with my friends at how ridiculous you are.

Don't get me wrong, it makes me feel good that you want to talk to me and possibly buy me a cocktail, but I'm only really in it for the free drink. It's more than just the fact that my boyfriend is up on the stage performing and I'm here to see him play. It's the truth that I just don't want to talk to you, no offense.

So please understand when I don't make more than polite conversation as your drink proceeds to spill on me for the 40th time. Maybe instead of a new drink, you can buy me a new outfit, asshole. Or maybe you could learn how to hold a drink while talking to a girl.

Sorry if I offended you, but even if I was single, your behavior is a major turn-off. Have a nice life!

~Jenn

p.s. - Also, please don't make those stupid comments trying to be "cute"....I just find them awkward and confusing, so do my friends.

Friggatriskaidekaphobia....meh, whatever

2012-01-13T22:32:00.000-05:00

Today is that uber-superstitious day again : Friday the 13th. Some people shy away from it, choosing to avoid all black cats, walking under any/all ladders, and anything with ominous numbers. On the other hand, there are others who choose the other side of that coin; they dare to bend the rules and defy the odds by any means necessary.

I tend to look at Friday the 13th as a "whatever happens, happens" kind of day. I have had positive and negative experiences on this very day. It doesn't mean that I'm not superstitious....quite the opposite. I don't step on cracks in the sidewalk, have an aversion to walking under any ladders, and treat mirrors like a fragile trinket in fear of breaking one. No, I just don't look at a day that is normally attached to "bad luck" as anything more than just a day.

It got me thinking about the idea of good or bad luck. I do believe in it, yes, but sometimes luck is what you make of your choices. Luck is determined by you, not by some divine spirit. If you want something bad enough, the cards fall in a way to cater to your favor. It won't always be easy to reach for it, but it's possible to attain it with a lot of hard work.

While I eagerly try to find some semblance of a "Friday the 13th" marathon, I can rest easy knowing that these superstitions don't dictate my life....I do.

~Jenny Rockstar

I think Oscar Wilde had it right....

2012-01-12T12:45:00.001-05:00

Sometimes (or actually quite a bit), I tend to reminisce about the past and how it brought me to where I am now. I look through old pictures, books of memories I have saved, listen to songs during that I had listened to during that time. Last night was no exception.

As I sat there with my book of memories open and flipping through my iPod for music, I felt the urge to put on the soundtrack for The Last Five Years. Flipping through the familiar tracks and re-living those memories, I reflected on where I was at that point in my life....2005.

Just out of college with the world ahead of me, I was still rather sad....even if I didn't want to acknowledge it at the time. I kept deluding myself that I was truly happy, even though I felt like I couldn't be myself for fear of rejection. Instead, I allowed others to mold & form me into an individual that today, I would probably sit down and lecture for their behavior. I was isolated from my old self, the one that loved to dance and sing and fill life with beauty and vibrancy.

The world felt like it was on my shoulders, literally. I had a family to keep happy, a bf to keep happy, friends to keep happy, a quest to find a job, a dream I was afraid I wouldn't reach and the nagging thought of rejection preying on my mind. I was a mess in many ways. When you graduate college, people think it's common to find cocky, confident graduates thinking they were going to make it. I wasn't one of them. I put up a good front that I was, but I worried about failing more times than anyone will ever know.

2005 was a lonely time, but not the worst one. (I think 2007 gets that honor.) It has taken me a long time to catch up with all those things I missed out on during that time, but I've finally gotten there. The past taught me to never let anything hold me back, whether it be a relationship, a job, my own insecurities, even a loved one. If it's what I want, people will understand.

I know it's not the end of me occasionally looking back on my past, but I know that my future looks a lot brighter than I can understand. It's what I make of it....not what others want it to be.

Finally, I get to be myself.

~Jenny Rockstar

Clearing the mind....and some dishes

2012-01-10T19:30:00.001-05:00

As I was tidying the house today, I couldn't help but feel my mind become less cluttered with every piece of clean clothing that was folded and put away, beds made, dishes washed, everything in its place. Normally, I'm alright with leaving the house in a bit of clutter, as long as it's not too out of control. But, as always, the clutter piles up and up and before you know it....there's more mess in a space that was once clean.

Lately, I've been wanting (and sometimes needing) that cleanliness in my life. Mainly because it makes the house look pretty and inviting, but also to help me think clearly. For so long, I was okay with the clutter. Looking back on that feeling, I probably tried to avoid dealing with the mess that needed to be organized and thought out. Instead, I would work to fill the mess with more things that may or may not help me to find the solution. Unfortunately, it never worked. So with time on my hands and a head full of junk, I started cleaning.

At first it seemed daunting, just like any task. But soon enough, when I finished one thing, another thing would be started without hesitation. And slowly, but surely, as each task was accomplished, I felt freer. I felt less discombobulated and scatter-brained. I felt more in control of my life and all around me. Everything was being put in its place, space was being created for new things; my mind felt more at ease with every dish that I laid out to dry.

I realize that there's still more to go, but I'm excited about keeping with this change. In fact, I welcome all that it offers.

~Jenny Rockstar

Making the right changes....

2012-01-09T23:20:00.000-05:00

Wow, I'm really enjoying this unwinding at the end of the day. After spending a rather large portion of my day cleaning, food shopping & researching for my next column, I've really started to think about what I want out of 2012.

Sure, I hope it's bigger and better than 2011 and all other years before, but what does that mean? What do I really want out of the next year that no other year has afforded me? As I sit here with my delicious green lemon tea (with honey), I started putting together a few goals that I hope to accomplish in 2012.

First, I know that my career is finally starting to take shape. In years past, all I would do is write and share with others what I wanted to share. Some tried to push me too fast in a direction that I wasn't really comfortable with, but that's okay. I lived and learned....realizing that I should never compromise what I know I want. So with my career underway, I plan on working towards my ultimate music journalism goal: interviewing my favorite musicians. It's a bit ambitious, but with my dream of Rolling Stone, it's all I could ever ask for!

Second, I want to improve on my health, which means better eating and exercise habits. I've already gone a couple weeks without drinking soda (or a lot of alcohol) all the time and I feel TONS better already! Now all I need is to continue getting back into eating healthier (and exercise routines) and all will be right with the world!

Third, it would be pretty awesome to learn a new language this year. I have the basic ones I want to learn/brush up on (Spanish, French, Italian, German)....but to add to that list, I'd want to learn a language I've never thought of learning before, maybe Mandarin Chinese or Greek. Maybe as a way to communicate better with Matt's relatives from Greece, I have my answer as to which one I should learn.

Fourth, if possible, I'd love to become a snail mail penpal for someone, whether it be a friend or a complete stranger. There's just something so special about receiving a letter in the mail. It means more than an email or a text. Spending the time to write to someone and share a piece of yourself with them? That's just wonderful.

Fifth, whenever I get the chance, I'd like to travel more. I know I need to save more, so this may take a back-burner while Matt & I save money, but even a few day trips to new places couldn't hurt, could it? It could also be a good thing for my photography.

Sixth, while writing about music continues to thrive for me, it would be fantastic to have a chance to attend a few concerts this year. I love seeing Matt perform as much as possible, but after seeing Bonnie Dune last summer, I realized I need to go to more original band shows. I felt a little more complete when I had the chance to do just that.

And seventh, speaking of writing, I should write more in this blog! I've spent so much time focused on music lately, that sharing my thoughts and stories here have dwindled considerably. It shouldn't. I should start writing even more this year than I have ever written. Every thought and feeling that I can type, it should be here.

Well, for now I'm ready to call it a night. Until tomorrow, my trusty readers. :::hugs & kisses:::

~Jenny Rockstar

Sometimes....I just can't help but feel the love

2012-01-04T17:58:00.002-05:00

Sometimes....I feel overwhelmed, but not in a bad way. I just see and feel the beauty of my life every chance I get. Whether it be in a song, a quote, a moment, a breath, anything really....my heart just feels the need to burst with joy.

Today is Matt's and my four year anniversary. And my first thought this morning was how blessed I feel in this moment. Before this, I had thought that I may never find happiness in anything ever again. But slowly and surely, the pieces of my heart were put back together, all rips & tears patched up, the rough edges smoothed over. While my heart may never be the same again, I know that without Matt, I would not be the same. I guess this is what it really feels like when you meet the love of your life.

You know, it feels amazing to feel this way, where everything and anything just fills you with such immense happiness....and now I wonder why I didn't think of this sooner. But life is about a journey, a path that we all decide to take. We make our own rules, our own maps and plan it out the way we think will take us to our destination.

I wonder where 2012 will take me in my journey. All I know is I'm ready to embrace it, all of it.

Bring it.

~Jenny Rockstar

Wrapping up my dreams with a big red bow....

2011-12-25T23:02:00.002-05:00

As I wind down from the rush of the holidays in Matt's and my living room, I can't help but feel blessed for the direction my life has taken this year. 2011 has definitely been not only a year of big steps, but a year of dreams coming true.

A few days before I turned 28, my friend Alison approached me about writing for her website, stylewhipped.com. It was the opportunity to write my own music column and share my love of music with more than just a handful of readers. Of course, I jumped at the chance and began to brainstorm for my first column: a holiday playlist. It wasn't until the night before my birthday that it truly hit me: by 28, I finally achieved the opportunity to write about music. About a week later, my first article was posted....and I started down the path towards my career.

Of course, I love blogging and sharing my love of music with all of you, but getting to share on a larger scale? It's only something I have dreamed of ever since I knew I wanted to be a music journalist! Matt was just as excited as I was, reminding me that while over the past few years I worried about when I would finally get the opportunity....that I had reached my goal. It was a beautiful moment, realizing that this year, my dreams came true. And I did it by just writing what was in my heart, not what others wanted me to write.

Now that I've finally reached one goal, I plan on making more for this new year. I want to write even more, find even more music, continue pursuing those ultimate goals I have always wanted. If nothing more, 2011 has taught me that even the impossible can become possible. Look at me, I managed to not only secure my dream, but I've seen my favorite show taped, met one of my favorite bands, moved into a house, made more wonderful friends around the world, had my photography used on a larger scale & did it all by just being me.

2012....you're going to be amazing, but you've got your work cut out for you, because 2011 kicked ass. I know that I'm going to hit the rough patches and I'm going to sometimes feel that I'm not quite making it, but I have to keep going. I have to keep reaching and hoping that I can make it. With the love and support of those around me, I know I can do it.

And so, as I end this quick post to all of you, I hope everyone has had a wonderful holiday season. Each and every one of you deserves all the happiness in the world and if you need it, I can share a little bit of my happiness with you. I'm dreaming even bigger in 2012, I hope you do the same.

~Jenny Rockstar

Music Columnist for Stylewhipped

(In the future, Contributing Writer for Rolling Stone....one day)

Celebs are people too....even the hot ones

2011-11-22T19:10:00.001-05:00

I remember at one point a couple years ago, I wrote about how celebrities, like us, are human. True, they make a lot of money and have throngs of screaming fans who would chase them for miles (if given the opportunity!) But when you strip away all the glitz and glamour of Hollywood, you're left with a person. Someone who just works hard to get where they are in life, nothing more (nothing less.)

Unfortunately, many others don't seem to grasp this concept. I choose not to name names, mainly because I still have some respect for privacy with the parties involved. But also, this story is just crazy! Case in point: today while checking my Twitter, I came across an enthusiastic fan who shared with their followers a video of a big celebrity smoking a cigarette outside of a hotel. At first, I was mildly upset (for a minute) to see the celebrity smoking, but just like a normal person....I got over it. Yet some of the other fans....did not.

As I scrolled down the page, I read comment after comment about how many were turned off by the smoking, outraged that it happened, and heartbroken by the revelation that the perfect 'squeaky-clean' image of this celeb had been tarnished in their eyes. There were mean and immature comments; a few concerned comments about the dangers and health risks involved. (Mainly, I just rolled my eyes at each comment, even chuckling a little at the use of caps and exclamation points littering the web-page, but thought it was sweet that some cared enough to express concern.)

In life, just about anyone and everyone will do something that you don't agree with (even celebrities.) When I was younger, I was soooooo pissed that Justin Timberlake announced he was dating Britney Spears, but I got over it (especially when I grew out of my teeny-bopper phase and realized that reality is much more fun.) The thought of Taylor Hanson married with kids made me sad at first (that I didn't get to marry him), but glad that he was getting to live his life the way he chose to. I wasn't okay with the times my friends would exclude me from hanging out because of our interests (and I found friends who wanted to include me in everything instead.) And even when a few of my friends took up smoking, while I may have cracked a joke or two that "they should quit" and "it's bad for your health," I encouraged them to make their own choices and be who they are.

The minor flaws & bad habits can't change a person's kindness or their character. Quite a few of my friends still do things like smoke and drink and party hard, but they're still my friends and I love them. They're there when I need them (and even when I don't.) Same goes for family. A person is still a person, even those in the spotlight. True, what they do is under a giant magnifying glass, but I can assure you that there are plenty of other people in the world who have done worse things than smoke a cigarette.

~Jenny Rockstar

Filling up....

2011-11-06T00:54:00.001-04:00

It's amazing what a few simple words can accomplish....

let me explain.

Over a week ago, while at a school in Asbury Park, I couldn't help but notice that many of the students were wearing bracelets that read "I am a Bucket Filler." I was intrigued, considering that I had NO clue what the bracelets meant. I mean, what could filling a bucket have to do with life? It wasn't until I took the picture of one of the faculty members that I noticed she was wearing a pin with that same phrase on it. I had to know everything.

She explained how the children were learning the importance of kind words and appreciation towards one another, and that when you "fill" someone's bucket, you give them positive and uplifting statements. As I finished taking her picture, I smiled and wished her a wonderful day.

As the day continued, the idea of being a "bucket filler" made me think. Being a child who was once bullied and taunted on a regular basis, my heart filled with pride and joy that steps were being made to show how positive reinforcements are better than sharing a negative one. On a regular basis, we hear stories in the media about bullying & school shootings, the effects of peer pressure on children. Frankly, it saddens me to believe that in a society where the media focuses on mostly the negative, that there are very few positive things that are shared.

But what about those positives? Is it so hard to fathom that maybe every once in a while, something that touches my heart is more important than all of the injustice and pain I see in the news on a regular basis?

So to take this whole "bucket filler" movement one extra step, I have made those simple efforts to bring a little more light to my job each day. Sometimes, a kind word or smile brightens another person's day. Sometimes it's leaving a little extra in the tip jar when you're buying coffee in the morning or maybe hugging a friend that's having a hard day.

To continue my "bucket filling" efforts, I figured a Top Ten was in order:

1) Apartment - Young The Giant
2) We Belong - The Colorful Quiet
3) It's Not Easy Bein' Green - Kermit the Frog
4) Your Hand in Mine - Explosions in the Sky
5) These Photographs - Joshua Radin
6) A Boy Like That/I Have A Love - West Side Story
7) Human - Darren Criss
8) Air - Ben Folds Five
9) My Sundown - Jimmy Eat World
10) Through Your Eyes - The Honey Trees

It's important to fill each other's lives with love and kindness every single day. There are too many negative people in this world and maybe, just maybe, the negativity can be cancelled out by something greater than we know.

~Jenny Rockstar

Are you there? It's me, Jenn....

2011-09-24T19:24:00.000-04:00

While I have found it difficult to write any new and interesting stories lately, I've decided to re-visit some old ones. Lately, my passion to write has lacked just a little....and instead of just giving up on the things I love, I do what I normally do when I need inspiration, buy a new notebook and start another story. But instead of the new notebook, it's a blog. And even more important, a blog about my goals and accomplishments, better known as my "bucket list."

If you're interested, here's the link:

The Dreams That Keep Us Close - Jenn's Bucket List

Getting back to those roots of what gave me the drive to write is important. And before I forget my journey to how I got where I am, I'd better try writing it all down first, even if in snippets here & there. But no worries, I promise to come back with even more writing pieces. I mean, it's not like I haven't been working on anything as of late. But the finished product should be good enough for me to want to hit "publish post."

And just so I don't leave you empty-handed, here's some Top Ten Awesomeness:

Jenn's Fall Playlist:

1) Emanuel & The Fear - Song For The Rain

2) Mae - Awakening

3) Smashing Pumpkins - Bullet With Butterfly Wings

4) Pixies - Where Is My Mind?

5) Secondhand Serenade - Goodbye

6) The Early November - This Is Love

7) The All-American Rejects - The Poison

8) Lady Gaga - You & I

9) Yaz - Only You

10) The Beatles - Lady Madonna

I hope everyone is having a wonderful beginning to fall....minus the inclement weather on the East Coast. This year is going to get even better than it already has, I can feel it.

~Jenny Rockstar

These memories are the soundtrack to my summer....

2011-08-20T19:13:00.002-04:00

Asbury Park Beach

With summer winding down and less than two weeks left before I head back to work, I can't help but be grateful for everything that has happened in these past couple of months....and even in this past year!

I look at my list of accomplishments and while a few of the bigger ones are yet to be crossed off, I've made leaps and bounds at some of the others. Ending my work season with moving into a new house was a wonderful way to start this summer! When we finally moved everything we owned into the house, there was certainly a lack of many necessities that we had had no need to buy prior. And so came the tiring (but fun for me) task of shopping! If furniture wasn't enough, there were also lamps, bedding, wall decor, kitchen utensils, outdoor decor, a grill, and any little knick-knack that had been provided for us in our previous residence. This summer became the task of putting our house together, creating a living space that was comfortable to both of us yet didn't break the bank.

Erin, Ryan & Matt

There was also more time spent with friends (and family!) I know I spend a lot of time with Matt, but I don't care, because he's not only my boyfriend, he's my best friend! So this summer, I set out to try and spend time with my bitta bunny (aka best friend Vicki), my co-workers, family members, and any of my friends who wanted to hang out! We had friends sleep over, sing-a-longs, nights of drinking red wine and listening to records, Tiki Bar drinks, raucous times, scary movie nights, and one big birthday party for our friend, Johnny! (Big props to his wonderful wife, Rhiannon for putting it all together!) Sometimes our activities would be group activities, sometimes just me and my friends. The benefit of being away from Matt proved to be fruitful as we spent our time missing each other just that little bit more, which made our quality time during this summer much more meaningful to the both of us.

Not only my lover, but my best friend <3

And as a result of all the changes in our life, the relationship with Matt has changed as well....in many good ways! All this time we've taken many important steps. In the beginning of our relationship, we made sure to talk a lot and establish that friendship. Then we took our time in dating. Soon after, I moved in with him, then a year later we moved into our first apartment. And now, two years after moving in that apartment, we moved into our first house. While my thoughts about marriage can sometimes vary, especially due to past experience, I've learned that it does not make a relationship any better or any worse. If that foundation is not there, then a ring on someone's finger is quite meaningless. That's not to say that I shun the thought of marriage, because just like any girl, I have my "dream wedding" already planned in my mind! In fact, we witnessed friends and family members tying the knot this summer....and realizing in the process that marriage is something we both want in life, just not yet. We have all the time in the world, the rest will take care of itself.

Atlantic City Expressway Heaven

Also during the late spring/summer, my photography has also been taken in a different direction. While I used to love just taking the pictures, I find that being able to play around with the effects and manipulate the pictures has been just as therapeutic. I don't care if some people don't like my pictures, because I like what I've been doing. In fact, while saving up for a new Canon (preferably either a 40D or....if I can save up enough, a 7D), I've taken a interest in lomography and wanting to try that as well. There are a few cameras that specialize in those kinds of effects and I may look into them as well. Photography is a lot of fun, something that when I was younger I never really thought to get into, but I enjoy what I do! And while saving up for some new cameras is great, some of my best work has been done with my little point-and-shoot, proving to me that you don't need the best equipment or the right classes to be the best, you just need to have an eye for great pictures. A friend once told me that the best way to get better at taking pictures is to take a lot of pictures....I think he was right.

A dream come true....

And of course, it's no surprise that I finally planned a girl's mini-vacation with my bitta bunny! When I decided to go see Bonnie Dune at Hershey Park, Vicki was right there with me to enjoy the experience....as were two of my friends from PA, Amy & Kate! I was determined to not only see the concert, but to meet the band in an attempt to secure a cool piece of autographed memorabilia for my bedroom wall. I had spent most of my summer carefully selecting each piece of decor for the house....and this particular item was no exception! Of course I was hoping to see the band before I decided this, but to meet the band became a challenge I was ready to meet! After 5+ hours of waiting on line to snag a wristband, as well as one hell of a concert, I had the pleasure to finally meet not only Bonnie Dune, but one of my favorite Glee stars as well! I feel privileged and honored to have had the opportunity that I did, because the guys reminded me of what I loved most about musicians. I felt as though I was hanging out with Matt and his bandmates, even if just for a little while. In a way, this concert re-connected me with my passion for music & writing, reminding me what it is about my life and career path that I love so much!

Me & my super cool Bonnie Dune poster!

I spent more time focusing on myself and figuring out what I want to do with my life. I love my job, but I wish I could also have my writing career underway. I ventured away from it for so long to escape my past and be at peace with my life, but I can't completely escape what I consider one of my greatest loves. So I got back into the habit of carrying a notebook in my bag again. My headphones became a permanent fixture in there too. I got lost in bookstores whenever I could, reading authors like Rob Sheffield and publications like Rolling Stone Magazine to immerse myself back into that 'old' me. My music project took on the task of fleshing out my music collection in many new & exciting directions. I laughed more, observed more, shared more of myself. I know I will never completely be that person again, but it's been nice reminiscing and being able to find the pieces of who I used to be and apply them to who I am now.

Since most of you, my readers, are well aware of my deeply passionate love for everything music, I've decided to turn my Top 10 into a Top 20 Soundtrack, complete with two sides, for this entry. There's just so much great music in the world, old and new....I need to include as much of it as possible!

Jenn's Summer 2011 Soundtrack:

Side One

1) The Smiths - How Soon Is Now?

2) Civil Wars - Poison & Wine

3) Bonnie Dune - Strange Ways

4) Jimmy Eat World - Littlething

5) Sondre Lerche - Dear Laughing Doubters

6) The Replacements - Here Comes A Regular

7) Procol Harum - A Whiter Shade of Pale

8) First Aid Kit - Tangerine

9) Florence + The Machine - Cosmic Love

10) Pharell - Prettiest Girls

Side Two

11) The Weepies - Simple Life

12) Death Cab For Cutie - Underneath The Sycamore

13) Bruce Springsteen - 4th of July, Asbury Park (Sandy)

14) Lady Gaga - The Edge of Glory

15) A Flock of Seagulls - Space Age Love Song

16) Violent Femmes - Please Do Not Go

17) Smashing Pumpkins - Tonight, Tonight

18) Vampire Weekend - Ottoman

19) Van Morrison - Slim Slow Slider

20) The Honey Trees - Don't Fear

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This summer was everything I could have hoped for....and then some. It was beautiful, exquisite, heart-wrenching, energizing, stressful, breath-taking, melancholy, aggravating, romantic, hilarious, tear-jerking, serene, heart-warming, and most importantly, memorable. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. With August taking its last few breaths and September well on its way, I look forward to finishing up 2011 with hope for my future, more pictures than I have wall or album space for, more music than my iPod can handle, more love than my heart has ever known, and more memories & stories to take with me through the years.

Thank you to everyone in my life, old and new, for contributing to this wonderful and unique experience. I love each and every one of you.

To my family and Matt's family for their support and love in everything that we do. We love you dearly.

To our wonderful friends for all the love, laughter, conversations, music, and everything else in between! We couldn't ask for better people to share our memories with.

To my Lifetouch crew, spending time with you (whenever I could) made this summer pretty awesome! Your friendship means more than you know.

To my Bitta Bunny and my Buddha for keeping me sane through it all....and their participation in possibly the greatest "Zombie Jesus" sing-a-long of all time!

And a special Thank You to Bonnie Dune for bringing me back to the music (and myself), as well as connecting me with some of the greatest fans/friends ever! You are truly the sweetest and most genuine gentlemen I have had the pleasure of meeting. If you ever come to my area for a show, you will always have a place to come chill and relax. (I also promise a delicious home-cooked meal and some sweet sing-a-longs with the various instruments in our house.)

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I can't wait to see what the rest of the year has in store....but I'm sure that whatever happens, it'll be one hell of an adventure.

~Jenny Rockstar

Time for some Concert Etiquette 101

2011-08-20T00:43:00.000-04:00

After my recent Bonnie Dune excursion with my bestie and music-loving friends, it came to my attention that while at the concert, there were a few fans who really disappointed me in their conduct towards band members, completely disrespecting and embarrassing the guys while on stage. With many disgruntled fans stepping up to voice their disdain for the situation, I had an idea. In an effort to make this negative part of the experience a positive, I decided to create a "guidelines" list for anyone who plans on attending concerts in the future. I've also included a few pointers based on my experience of dating a musician. Granted, this is not for everyone, since most people can be civilized, but for those who apparently don't know how to act and behave when seeing a band they like.

1) Respect the band members. Granted, in some bands, there are certain members fans gravitate to more than others, but that's no reason to be mean or rude to other band members while they're putting on a show. Keep in mind that all the musicians/performers on stage are working hard to give you a great time, so don't give them any lip for it. For example, telling the lead singer to move so that you can look at the drummer? Not cool. Screaming out for only one band member the entire time? Disappointing. If you really loved the band, you'd be cheering hard for every person....instead of just the one you think is hot. So while you may be in love or crush on that hot guitar player/bassist/keyboard player/drummer/lead singer....just be mindful that that one musician wouldn't be there without the rest of their band backing and blending that music harmoniously for you.

2) Don't be "that fan." You know the type of fan I'm talking about....the annoying one who shouts stupid crap when the audience is quiet or the musicians are trying to talk and connect with their fans during the show. Frankly, hearing someone scream "Did you read the sign?" over and over while a lead singer is talking about the significance of a song is hardly appropriate. Of course they read the sign, they get it. Now move on and let the band do what they were meant to do....give the audience a great show!

3) Be enthusiastic and energetic (when the show calls for it)! While you shouldn't be annoying, don't be afraid to have a little fun....especially if you're at a rock concert! Dance, sing along, tell the musicians you love them at the top of your lungs, cheer loudly at the end of each song, hold your phone up like a lighter, paint your face with the band name, wear the band t-shirt....whatever strikes your fancy! The whole point is to have a good time, so why not?!?

4) Don't be trashy or slutty, especially if a musician has a significant other. I speak from personal experience on this, especially since my bf is in a cover band. (And yes, this concept applies across the board, so listen carefully.) There have been many moments where while at a show, a girl has thrown herself at Matt, flirting and giggling and slipping him their phone number in hopes that he'll call her. (A few have even called him out on not calling at the next show they attend.) I know he won't, unless this girl has proven herself to be chill and into the music more than anything else. But there is that small percentage of girls/guys who don't care that the significant other may be there in the audience and would love nothing more than to prove they're a "better fit" than the musician & their partner. So a word to the wise: do not venture down this road. Keep your self-respect and self-worth intact. Granted, I'm the chill gf who enjoys seeing Matt talk to the adoring fans and keep them coming back out for more. I encourage conversation and casual flirting if it means they'll come out to the next show. Hell, I've even become friends with a few of the cool girls, especially when I've won them over with my charm, kindness, and sweet dancing skills. But some significant others aren't as chill and won't hesitate to draw blood over the girls/guys that disrespect them and their relationship. (And yes, from time to time I have wanted punch a girl that disrespects me.) Remember this the next time you flirt inappropriately with a taken band member.

5) Keep in mind the type of audience you're a part of. I've had my fair share of concerts where I've seen the various posters saying "Marry Me" or "[insert band/performers here] Rules!" Or people shouting how much they love the band. In fact, I've even made a few of those posters when attending concerts (and screamed a few "I LOVE YOU"s in my day!) For the most part, I think it's cool that fans take the time to make posters and things of the like, even if the messages can be a little bit much. But if you're at a concert where a good portion of the audience members came with their parents or look like they're still in high school, please refrain from any obscene phrases or sexual offers. If that's your angle, check out when Def Leppard or Whitesnake will be in town. The audience will be suited much more to your liking.

6) Don't get upset if a band member doesn't contact you. Sometimes upon meeting your idols/favorite musicians, you may give them a letter or token of your appreciation. I'm even guilty of doing this. And in those letters or little gifts, a way for them to contact you has been provided. Now, I know this is going to sound mean saying this, but please know that while you think this may be the beginning of an epic friendship, 99.999999999% of the time....they will never contact you. While you may be mad, consider that you're A) 'not the only one who has thought of this idea' and B) 'they may not have the time to respond to you'. But do know that they're appreciative that you've taken the time to give them a part of you, especially since they give you a part of themselves every time they perform or release new music.

7) Get creative with your gifts! Bands do love receiving cool stuff from their fans. Like in my previous listing, giving a gift is like giving a part of yourself. It's meaningful and extremely touching. So if you're going to give a gift, feel free to have some fun with it! I've seen fans make bracelets/t-shirts, bake treats, make scrapbooks, etc. Don't hesitate to brainstorm and dig deep for a cool gift idea. Sometimes, it's those fun, unique gifts that get you noticed.

8) Be yourself. This is hard to do sometimes, especially when there's a chance you may get to meet the band/performer, but it's extremely important to remember! Combined with the above guidelines, just remaining chill and calm will gain you the opportunities you desire. For example, one of my favorite bands in college (Jupiter Sunrise) hung out with me and my friend Colleen just because we were cool. We joked around, I complimented the lead singer on his awesome Weezer shirt (and was rewarded with a hug), and didn't try to be anything we were not. I consider those band members friends to this day. Even when I went to see Bonnie Dune, my bestie Vicki & I just talked to the guys about how we had done karaoke the night before and only had three hours of sleep under our belts before driving out for the concert. Result? Cory Monteith asking my friend & I where this karaoke existed, sounding interested in participating in said activity. The point being, if you can just be you, band members will appreciate you more for it. Besides, aren't we always told that it's great when others can accept you for you?

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I hope that these guidelines have been helpful. They're not rules, but just some friendly tips to remember. But the most important one? HAVE FUN!

Thanks for listening.

~Jenny Rockstar

Susceptibility to commitment....catching "the bug"

2011-07-15T16:30:00.000-04:00

As of late, almost everyone around me has caught what I will call the marriage bug. It starts like this: when you hit your mid to late-20s, it feels like every other day, there's a friend either getting engaged, getting married, or on the verge of expecting. Escape is futile while those announcements clutter the Facebook news feed at an alarming rate, your texts from friends sharing the great news, or the phone calls that never end.

I won't lie, in a way, it makes me sad. Here I am at 27 years old, waiting to be bit by the bug once again. It's not a necessity to be married right here right now, but it has become something that no matter how much I try to tune it out, it's there. And for most of us that are still not married or in a relationship, this can become disconcerting....and at times, depressing.

Granted, after my previous failed attempt at being engaged, I made a decision to really get to know the next person I would be in a relationship with. I not only wanted to be in a relationship for a substantial amount of time, but also be around them long enough to really know what I was getting into. Less time would go into expensive gifts, more time into appreciating the simple things in life. I wouldn't settle for always scheduling time together, but rather being able to see someone just about any time that I wanted at a moment's notice. And most important, I wanted to be able to be myself with this person, not just feel like I had to be what they wanted me to be. Because let's face it, if you can't be yourself with the person you want to spend your time with, then what's the point of even living? The right person will accept you for who you are and desire to be around you for that.

As fate would have it, I found these very traits and 3.5 years later, it still feels like I'm falling for the first time. Recently, my friend Rhiannon reminded me that I shouldn't feel like I'm being pressured into taking the next step, but more that I should be patient with whatever comes next. And that above all else, as long as there's true love there, everything will come in its own time. I know she's right, especially knowing that what I knew before this relationship wasn't exactly the real thing. True, there were moments, but my relationship should be more than just the moments. I want the whole thing, not just little bites here and there.

Vacations and dinner dates are nice to have, but that day-to-day interaction is what matters. The ability to have a casual conversation that engages you. Cooking dinner together as much as possible. Rubbing one another's feet after a long day. Going to the store together to make decisions on either what to eat or what would look great in a certain room. Just sitting in the same room not talking, but feeling comfortable in that silence. Never forgetting to say every single day just how much you mean to each other, even if you're fighting or just in a bad funk. Sharing a smile or a look across a crowded room, showing appreciation and love.

These are the things that matter most and while I haven't reached that next step just yet, I know it won't be taken out of obligation or pressure. It'll be done because it's meant to happen like that. My day may not come anytime soon, but I don't discount that it's coming. While it makes me a little sad that it hasn't come yet, the patience will be rewarding in the end.

For those who are either in the same boat as me or still searching, here's my playlist of hope:

Jenn's Hopeful Playlist:

1) Bigger Than My Body - John Mayer
2) Marry Me - Train
3) Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop - Landon Pigg
4) Look Straight at Me - Dave Pittenger Band
5) Thank You - Led Zeppelin
6) Sweet Thing - Van Morrison
7) Vienna - Billy Joel
8) Only You - Yaz
9) Let It Be Me - Rosie Thomas
10) Someone Like You - Adele

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Being patient may not always be easy, but I have hope for my future....even if it's not exactly where I want it just yet.

~Jenny Rockstar

Grabbing life by the lapels....

2011-06-19T17:29:00.000-04:00

This time last year, I wrote something really special and meaningful for my father: the songs that reminded me of my fondest memories of him. This year, as I contemplated what to say about my awesome father on a day designed just for him, tragedy struck in our family. Yesterday afternoon, my cousin Anthony suffered a major heart attack and passed away. He was only 55 years old, so many years of life left and love to give.

While Anthony and I shared very few words, the news hit me very hard, especially knowing that my two cousins Nicole and Toni Rose lose out on the opportunity to share their love with their father on this special day....and that my Aunt Annie in a little over a decade has had to bury a husband, all her brothers, and now her son.

It got me thinking about how precious life truly is. Sometimes we spend all of our time putting off things that we should have done sooner for a later time. We procrastinate, we laze around, and we take those simple moments in life for granted. I'm always trying to remember how many things I have to be grateful for, which is what prompts my playlist for this entry.

Jenn's Life Playlist:

1) Life - Our Lady Peace

2) Hear You Me - Jimmy Eat World

3) Wish You Were Here - Pink Floyd

4) Home Again - Carole King

5) Homeward Bound - Simon & Garfunkel

6) Take Me Home, Country Roads - John Denver

7) When We Were Younger - Lakes

8) Memories - Weezer

9) With You In Your Dreams - Hanson

10) The Other Side - David Gray

Life is meaningful, so don't waste or ruin it. Enjoy the lazy Sundays and the crazy-filled days. Take random road-trips or international adventures as much as you can. Dress up for a romantic dinner for no reason or snuggle up on the couch with some ice cream and a good movie. Don't count all the calories, nickels and dimes, or schedule every single detail of your life. Be spontaneous and breathe in everything you can.

As an added bonus to this entry, I'd like to share a poem by Walt Whitman in honor of Anthony.

My Departure

by Walt Whitman

Not in a gorgeous hall of pride,
   Mid tears of grief and friendship's sigh,
Would I, when the last hour has come,
   Shake of this crumbling flesh and die.

My bed I would not care to have
   With rich and costly stuffs hung round;
Nor watched with an officious zeal,
   To keep away each jarring sound.

Amidst the thunder crash of war,
   Where hovers Death's ensanguined cloud,
And bright swords flash, and banners fly,
   Above the sickening sights of blood;

Not there—not there, would I lay down
   To sleep with all the firm and brave;
For death in such a scene of strife,
   Is not the death that I do crave.

But when the time for my last look
   Upon this glorious earth should come,
I'd wish the season warm and mild,
   The sun to shine, and flowers bloom.

Just ere the closing of the day,
   My dying couch I then would have
Borne out in the refresing air,
Where sweet shrubs grow and proud trees
      wave.

The still repose would calm my mind,
   And lofty branches overhead,
Would throw around this grassy bank,
   A cooling and a lovely shade.

At distance through the opening trees,
   A bay by misty vapours curled,
I'd gaze upon, and think the haven
   For which to leave this fleeting world.

To the wide winds I'd yield my soul,
   And die there in that pleasant place,
Looking on water, sun, and hill,
   As on their Maker's very face.

I'd want no human being near
   But at the setting of the sun,
I'd bid adieu to earth, and step
   Down to the Unknown World—alone.

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Happy Father's Day to all of the dads out there and to my own father, who continues to be the greatest dad in the whole world. I love you, Dad, and I'm grateful I still get the chance to tell you that.

~Jenny Rockstar (aka Honeybunch)

Coming home....

2011-06-17T22:05:00.000-04:00

Home.

I've been contemplating that word a lot as of late, especially since Matt and I have finally moved out of our winter rental on the beach and into a year-round house. For many, home is just a place where you go at the end of the day, rather than a frame of mind. Four walls, the necessary rooms, and a place to put all of your stuff. But not for me. Home, to me, has become something more than just a place....it has become a frame of mind.

Throughout my life (so far), I have had quite a few places that I have lived. Some more temporary than others, but each with their own flair.

In childhood, home was always the place I could return to at the end of the day. True, there were rules and chores and consequences for breaking rules, but I was always welcome there. Even during my college years, I could always return home and feel at ease. But of course, as it always goes, you outgrow your childhood home.

When my friend and I moved into our own place, it was heaven. No more curfews, no more rules, no more responsibility to anyone but ourselves (and our landlord). If we wanted to have a get-together at our house, we could plan one without permission. Walking in the door at 4 am was no issue either. And even if I felt the need to lounge in my underwear, I could do so without much fuss....and within reason. When I was 22 years old, the notion of home was a place where I could do anything I wanted to do, not really feeling consequences for any of my actions. By 24, however, home became more of a place where I could sort out my life.

I will never have any regrets moving out of Northern New Jersey. In fact, while the job situation down here may not be as plentiful as closer to Manhattan, getting away from all of the painful memories that I had endured prior to this move was much needed. I desired a place to clear my head, a place where I could still be who I needed to be and do everything necessary to figure out my life. And getting the chance to live with Matt? Perfect. I know a few of my friends didn't agree with my decision to live with him so soon, but I made the right choice for me.

By 25, Matt and I had agreed that it was time for us to move into a place of our own. And now home became a place that I could share with someone else, a place where Matt & I could test and work on our relationship....another decision I was proud to make. Granted, it was only a winter rental, which are popular with places near the beach, but I enjoyed the solitude of walking in the surf in the off-season. Hearing the waves crash into the surf from my front door was soothing, in more ways than most can imagine. And for two years, with at least one temporary summer move for 6 weeks, our beach haven gave us the time to figure out the next step.

Which brings me to now, 27 years old, and we have finally found a year-round home. So many different definitions of the word, but I think I get it now. Home isn't necessarily just a place, it's who you're with, your own level of comfort, your life. It's all of those definitions I came to know and yet none of them. It's the existence you create in the world....and I'm proud that in my life, I found home.

As a special treat from our moving endeavors, here are some of the top songs that I can include in my moving playlist:

Jenn's Moving Playlist:

1) Two of Us - The Beatles
2) The Cave - Mumford & Sons
3) Haunting - Bonnie Dune
4) So Caught Up In You - 38 Special
5) Hello - Martin Solveig
6) Land-Locked Blues - Bright Eyes
7) Settle Ancient Mind - Jupiter Sunrise
8) Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous - Good Charlotte
9) Memory (Acoustic) - Sugarcult
10) Home - Michael Buble

~Jenny Rockstar

There's a better view....especially in the way of music

2011-06-02T19:53:00.000-04:00

For a while, I've been wanting to share with all of you about one of my new favorite bands, Bonnie Dune....yet the words have continued to fail me every time I sit down and try to sort through my thoughts. True, they've been on my current playlists, yet where do I start to talk about an up and coming band that most people outside of the West Coast and the Glee community have never heard of?

But then as I was working on my "to-do" list for our impending move, I had the chance to talk with a fellow Bonnie Dune fan that I randomly befriended, Alison. She asked me about my intent to see the guys in Hershey Park at the end of July, which I was more than excited to talk about! In turn, she shared her own Bonnie Dune experience when she saw them in Canada in May. The way the band members took the time to go out into the crowd and mingle, talking with fans in the audience, even their graciousness at receiving gifts from their adoring fans. Needless to say, it sparked my inspiration and so here I am, ready to share the awesomeness that is Bonnie Dune.

To most people, Bonnie Dune may just be considered the band that Cory Monteith drums for. And of course, because of this reason, fans show up by the thousands just to catch a glimpse of the Glee star rockin' out on stage. But to those who have really taken the time to listen to the music and get to know the other band members, Bonnie Dune is an experience filled with warmth, friendship, and most important....incredible music!

When I first started finding their music online, I was taken back quite a bit. Lately, I've been missing that music scene that really connects with the audience and proves that real musicians are still out there. In college and for a year or so after, I had Jupiter Sunrise getting me through life. After their first show, I had the opportunity to talk with them and share stories, many hugs, and love of life! Their music was inspirational and different from what most bands were releasing. Granted, I do love music and I'm on iTunes daily trying to find stuff to add, but I haven't found the new artist/band that grabs me at my very soul....until now.

Originally the brain-child of lead singer Justin Wilczynski and Jason Massey, Bonnie Dune is finally picking up the momentum with the addition of band members Seth Roberts, Joshua Kerr, and of course, Cory Monteith! Jason is no longer performing with the band, but still contributes as a producer/co-writer. Each musician is a powerhouse in their own right, with their various side projects, TV shows and movies, etc.

While most performances can be found on the West Coast, I'm definitely planning a mini-road trip when the band takes their show to Hershey Park on July 31st. (As I've stated in recent posts!) I may never get my dream of a NJ show, preferably in Asbury Park or at the Starland Ballroom, but I'll take what I can get. My real hope is that I get to meet the men who have continued to restore my faith in the music scene. From what I've heard from their community of fans through various tweets/pictures/conversations, they're very sweet and probably the most down-to-earth individuals one can know. I'm sure the west coast Bonnie Dune fans will miss their boys for this performance, but the east coast promises to share the love....and possibly some hugs!

And so, in my typical rockstar fashion to fit my life lately, here is this week's moving/excitement playlist!

Jenn's Moving Playlist:

1) You Are A Tourist - Death Cab for Cutie

2) Better View - Bonnie Dune

3) Rainy Day Women #12 & 35 - Bob Dylan

4) The Lazy Song - Bruno Mars

5) Little Lion Man - Mumford & Sons

6) The Chain - Fleetwood Mac

7) Daylight - Matt & Kim

8) Run Like Hell - Pink Floyd

9) Life is Beautiful - Watashi Wa

10) Heroin - The Velvet Underground

I hope everyone has a wonderful week and if you can, check out Bonnie Dune Fans for the most up-to-date info on the band, as well as listen to tracks and get links to other important websites! Also, a special thanks to Alison for her stories, as well as my Twitter/Facebook friends who have shared their Bonnie Dune experiences!

~Jenny Rockstar

If you want to view paradise....simply look around and view it....

2011-05-13T15:58:00.000-04:00

With more downtime coming up, I've been thinking more and more about what my plans are for this summer. While I want to hone in on my creative ventures, this year has also been about learning to appreciate my life. Because let's face it, most of us wish we had more things going for us. In fact, I admit to being one of those individuals who always tries to push beyond the boundaries and find better things out there. In some respects, this has helped greatly in me finding out who I am. But at the same time I've come to the realization that sometimes, what you're looking for is right in front of your face.

Last night, after a long day of work and such, I came across free music downloads from my favorite show, Glee. Luckily, the songs are from next week's episode aptly titled Funeral. So, being the big fan that I am and a HUGE lover of new music, I just had to have the downloads. Among them was the song Pure Imagination, which was originally (and eloquently) performed by Gene Wilder in the classic film Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory. This song has always been inspirational and uplifting to its very core, the words simply implying that there are moments we need to dig deep and believe in the things we dream.

While listening to Chris Colfer's character Kurt (and cast) singing the classic tune, one line in the song struck me like it never had before: "if you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it." For a moment, it almost felt as if time stopped and this great epiphany came to light. I had listened to this particular song hundreds of times before, yet the meaning hadn't caught on.

It's weird how I never got it before, but in that little moment, I finally understood what Gene Wilder's character was trying to tell the winners (and us) in the movie. Life isn't always about the grandeur and reaching for perfection....no. Instead, try to view your life as perfect in those little imperfections and nuances. Paradise is not something to be found outside, but rather inside. We spend so much time thinking that "having it all" entails a big prize, lots of money, that cushy 6-figure job, etc. Yet if we really think about what makes something perfect, the answer to achievement is a lot simpler....in my case, he was sitting right on the couch next to me.

I glanced over at Matt watching tv while the rest of the song played out....and I smiled. He's always told me that he doesn't believe Heaven is up above us, but rather we're living in it. Sure, there are times that things can get rough and take a while to get back to being ok, yet I got it. Life in itself is Paradise....and oh, it is truly beautiful! Our paradise is here....I couldn't be more grateful for that.

On a different note, as stated in my previous entry, I've been spending a lot of time focusing on finding new music for my collection. And while part of me wishes I could share all the new stuff that I've added, I know that to mention it all would take me forever and a day! Yet, in discovering this new music, I have found a certain calm and balance to life.

In an effort to share what's been playing non-stop on my iPod, I would like to share my Top Ten songs on my playlist at least once or twice a week, depending on my mood. As of late, it's been mainly new music and some classics with a modern twist.

Jenn's Most Played This Week:
1) Pure Imagination (Glee Cast Version) - Glee Cast (if nothing else, listen to this song!)
2) Someone Like You - Adele
3) Threw It On The Ground - The Lonely Island
4) Pretending - Glee Cast
5) Oh Lovely - Lakes
6) Drunk Girls - LCD Soundsystem
7) Eclipse (feat. Henry Rollins) - The Flaming Lips & Stardeath and The White Dwarfs
8) I Need A Doctor - Dr. Dre (feat. Eminem & Skylar Grey)
9) Harvest Moon - Neil Young
10) Vienna - Billy Joel

I encourage everyone to realize their own version of 'paradise' in life....even if it takes you a while, I hope you find it. Have a great weekend!

~Jenny Rockstar

Making a comeback....Jenn style!

2011-05-07T15:10:00.000-04:00

Life. What a funny way it has of taking your time and speeding it up in the blink of an eye. While I've always tried to make time to share what's on my mind, lately I've been finding less and less time to figure out how to put my thoughts into words. But for now, with mere minutes before I have to head out in the midst of another crazy weekend, I felt it was necessary to sit and process everything in my life.

I had decided 2011 was going to be the year of accomplishing some of my biggest goals. Of course, every year is a year to tackle something I have never attempted to do before, but I had had enough of feeling like I wasn't getting into some of those more meaningful goals....that needed to change. Instead of focusing on purely writing and focusing solely on those huge goals, I wanted to tackle the simpler tasks.

In January, Matt and I celebrated our anniversary by actually going somewhere out-of-state for an overnight, complete with a day of shopping/sight-seeing, a delicious dinner, and a night in a cozy B&B in New Hope, PA. Taking the time to appreciate those moments that we sometimes take for granted was really nice. Both of our schedules never really allow for going out and doing the normal couples stuff, yet we manage to take the time for those simple moments. This year has brought with it a need to continue down this particular path, taking more pictures and having more adventures that push beyond our normal routine. And getting to do this all with my best friend....priceless.

After receiving a new program for photography for my 27th Birthday, I've also been itching to take more pictures. It feels like so many people are finally starting to get more into their picture-taking, so upping the ante on my computer and trying some new techniques with my photos seemed appropriate. While I may just be starting out with Lightroom and finding ways to make my flash work in low light settings with uneven ceilings/surfaces, finally accomplishing those shots that I've wanted to capture will happen now. I can't wait for this summer when I can try out a few of those tricks at more shows, especially the Bonnie Dune concert I want to attend at Hershey Park in July. (And for those of you looking for an awesome concert this summer, Bonnie Dune at Hershey Park on July 31st is the place to be!)

Then, just when I thought it would never happen, I actually had the chance to go into the city and watch my favorite show Glee being filmed. Completely random trip to the city, but well worth the experience! I took some pretty sweet pictures of the actors and filming, including some close-ups of some of my favorites. The experience alone validates the importance of being able to do what you love in life....and doing a damn good job of it! Those actors work so hard, starting super early in the morning and going until late at night, they are just as much of an inspiration in their work as anyone else who works hard at what they love. It reminds me that it doesn't matter what your calling may be, just as long as that calling means something to you. I'm surrounded by people who pursue their dreams just by doing them and not caring about the outcome. As long as you continue to do what you love, everything will fall into place.

And of course, I can't forget to mention that I've also taken my music project to newer levels and really branched out of my shell with some of my iTunes finds! Granted, the writing it hasn't been very forthcoming, but the experiences of adding different types of music to my playlist has proven fruitful and worthwhile. When one continues to strive learning more about things they love, the outcome can be quite exhilarating and exciting, which brings me back to now.

Here we are, at the beginning of May....and I feel like while there's still so much more for me to accomplish, I know that the rest of this year will give me the opportunity to make more of those goals a reality. And so, as an added treat to show the progress of my music project, I want to share with all of you my current most-listened to songs on my iPod. I'll be able to give a more proper update when time permits, but it's about time I started writing more and focusing on reaching for more of those simple goals that I hope to cross off my ever-growing list.

Jenn's May Playlist:

1) Sailboat - Bonnie Dune (If you haven't heard their music....do check them out!)

2) Never Going Back Again - Fleetwood Mac

3) Bloom - Radiohead

4) Things We Do For Love - 10cc

5) Icky Thump - The White Stripes

6) Tris In Haze - Jupiter Sunrise

7) Rolling In The Deep - Adele

8) Half Life I - Arcade Fire

9) Season of The Witch - Donovan

10) Barbra Streisand - Duck Sauce

~Jenny Rockstar

To Make An End Is To Make A Beginning....Saying Farewell to 2010

2010-12-28T22:53:00.000-05:00

As we prepare to say goodbye to 2010, I can't help but feel blessed at all this year has given me! Through the good and the bad, I have experienced more love, laughter, friendship, smiles, and moments that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world!

On the flipside, I've also experienced loss, heartache, and pain that I had never thought I would need to go through again. Yet here I am, stronger and more vibrant than ever, reflecting on all of the memories that I've been a part of.

Now every year, I've been known to go through my list of people that I'm grateful for and thank everyone in my life for being there, yet this year, I'm deciding to change things up a bit. Of course, I am grateful for everyone and everything in my life, because where would I be without all of it? I would definitely not be where I am today....feeling like a part of something important.

Instead, I can't help but focus on all of the negativity, hatred, stubbornness, laziness, greed, and spite that seems to exist. Frankly, it breaks my heart that people just can't seem to put aside their differences and show some compassion for one another. Instead, there is mud-slinging and throwing blame on each other....totally not necessary, especially during the holiday season!

The whole concept of this anti-cheer really got me thinking about some of my own hopes and dreams for the upcoming year. I have my own to focus on, yet I do have some resolutions that everyone can be a part of! Wasn't it John Lennon who said, "All we are saying, is give peace a chance?" I think for once, let's all put our differences aside and create some hopes and dreams for this upcoming year:

1) Ban all personal hatred and negativity online. Frankly, I'm getting tired of watching others fight over a public forum about who slighted who. If you're going to fight, unfriend one another. A social network should not become The Jerry Springer Show. If you really don't have anything nice to say, just remember that success is the best revenge. Retaliating with nasty words only perpetuates the notion that you are just as immature as the person you fight with. Unfortunately, if you really feel the need to fight, do it in private....I'm sick of being subjected to it.

2) Music should re-establish its relationship with emotions, not the Benjamins. It saddens me that nowadays when I listen to popular music, all that I can gather from it is its ability to generate money for banal, clichéd lyrics and over-played beats. Really? Can we only re-use classic songs and interject a techno rhythm in there....and call it music? I miss the days of less blingy hip-hop and more garage bands. I want that rise to the top, the feeling of music that touches you with its words and raw emotion, the way one feels when they connect with the music and focus only in on that moment. Music that makes me shed a tear means more than music that is fist-pump worthy.

3) Everyone should smile more. In a time of economic crisis, I can empathize with the inability to see the silver lining in life. Yet smiling is a simple way to turn the tough times into something more bearable. Life is too short to go through it frowning. And you know what they say....smiling can be contagious.

4) Don't be afraid to speak up against things that bother you. For this one, I see way too many people that don't open up their mouth when they feel the need to say something. For the new year, I want to see more people speaking up and fighting for what they believe in! We all talk a big talk....but walking the walk is much different.

5) Sharing more love and kindness with one another. Yes, this could fall under the whole need to smile more, yet I'm talking about how we communicate with one another. Whenever I'm in a store, I make it a point to always ask the clerk how they're doing, say "thank you" and "have a good day," and especially during the winter months where the weather is less that favorable, wish them a safe trip home. Those few moments of kindness really do resonate with people. (On a side note, reminding your loved ones just how much you love them is important....you don't always get a next time to say it.)

6) To not be afraid in changing the world. Let's face it: our government may put certain things into effect, but we have the power to change it. Sometimes one voice is all it takes to be the catalyst....so don't shrink in fear of being someone greater than you are. That one moment you try to make a change, something wonderful could happen. You never know.

7) Spend more time writing more snail mail letters. Yes, snail mail. We spend so much time writing e-mails and text messages that we forget what methods we used before that. I used to love the idea of walking up to the mailbox and finding a letter addressed to me. So, if you must, find a pen pal and break out the pen and paper. Just because some may find letter writing a little antiquated doesn't mean that it won't touch the heart of the letter recipient. (Also, a phone call never hurt anyone either!)

8) Appreciate the simple things in life. The trend that I have noticed is that we're a selfish, greedy bunch. Material items mean more than immaterial, a video game replaces a good old-fashioned game of hide-and-seek. Whatever happened to a walk in the park or running through the rain? (Even in super snowy conditions, snow angels and a little snowball fight?) The simplest things can be just as fun as amusing one's self with video games and HDTVs.

9) Be more considerate of those in the spotlight, especially if they are out in public. When I see people post videos of running into celebrities and the celeb tends to ignore them....I watch the person who was trying to gain the attention blast them like no other! Celebrities are people too, ok? It really makes me sad to see that if someone doesn't get a piece of memorabilia from someone like Johnny Depp or Kim Kardashian, that they'll automatically burn them on television or viral video. Would you like it if someone stuck cameras in your face all the time, demanding you give them something? It's not all about you, so give it a rest and respect the fact that they may be out to dinner with friends or walking their dog....not really wanting to put on that showface just for you.

10) Never stop learning. This feels silly saying this, but sometimes, I feel like most people forget this simple lesson. In order to continue living, we need to keep learning each and every day. It can be something as simple as attempting to cook, or complicated like emotionally connecting in a relationship. Whatever the case may be, no one should ever think that they know it all....because they don't. One person or thing cannot solve all the world's problems, only though trial and error can it happen.

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I wish everyone a Happy and Healthy New Year! Let's see if we can truly become the individuals that we strive to be in 2011. And if we can't, to at least take steps to getting there.

~Jenny Rockstar

Memories, Christmas Memories....they're the sweetest ones I know....

2010-12-21T05:45:00.000-05:00

When Thanksgiving ends and the countdown to Christmas begins....my mind goes into holiday overdrive. Where many dread the holiday season, I love everything about it!

Every year, I make the tree-decorating process as fun as possible, complete with Christmas music (or possibly a great holiday-themed movie).

Little holiday knick-knacks adorn the tables, as well as sugar cookie scented candles.

Multi-colored lights around the windows and cheesy Christmas decor hung up on the walls.

Christmas shopping and gift wrapping becomes a sport....a very fun one, at that!

Writing out Christmas cards becomes an all-day event, complete with cute, personalized messages for as many as I can come up with!

I always manage to give a few dollars to the Salvation Army whenever I hear that familiar bell ringing and see the red collection bucket.

Driving around and admiring the lights on homes and decor in front yards makes me light up with glee.

Sharing a smile and 'Happy Holidays' with anyone I encounter/talk to makes me feel all warm inside.

A great night consists of a nice glass of red wine and admiring the lit (and beautifully decorated) tree.

Catching the smile when someone opens up your gift and realizes just how important they are to you.

And last, but certainly not least, the mistletoe carefully hung right by the front door, signaling the world to acknowledge that hugs and kisses are required upon entry.

Yes, I haven't lost that Christmas spirit, even though for many, this holiday is viewed as 'too commercial' or 'all about gifts'. Instead, for me, it's a time to share kindness and joy with those around you (and those you briefly encounter.)

In the spirit of Christmas, I've chosen to share my ten of my favorite Christmas songs....because what holiday season would be complete without them? Let's face it, the familiar notes of Nat King Cole crooning The Christmas Song is enough to fill my heart with more love and warmth than any cup of hot chocolate any day!

1) Nat King Cole - The Christmas Song: The quintessential holiday classic! This song just oozes yuletide cheer with a crooner's feel. Every time this song comes on, it reminds me that it is finally the holiday season. Those opening strings, coupled with that velvety voice....my heart melts.

2) James Taylor - Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas: There is something about James Taylor that is synonymous with warmth and cheer....this song just furthering his image. HYAMLC has always made me tear up ever since I could remember hearing the song for the first time. A song that talks about wishing the best for others during the holidays and reminding us that if the fates allow, we will get to share another holiday season with those we love and care about.

3) Vince Guaraldi Trio (& Cast) - Christmastime is Here: Let's face it....Christmas is not right without watching A Charlie Brown Christmas. And while I could go on & on about the entire soundtrack, this song in particular makes me really think about Christmas. Charlie Brown and his friends truly know how to make me get into the holiday spirit. (And for those who have no clue of what makes this special one of the best....watch it, especially Linus's big speech.)

4) The Carpenters - Merry Christmas, Darling: True, my fave show Glee did cover this song (and it was wonderful), but the original is always the best. Karen Carpenter's melancholy makes me realize that the holiday season would be better shared with the one you love rather than apart and dwelling on the sadness. (And Rachel's performance moved me to almost as many tears as I watched her pine for the one person she couldn't have this holiday season.)

5) Dean Martin - Baby It's Cold Outside: Ooooooh, this may be one of the most fun/romantic songs I can think of! What better premise is there than a woman trying to head home in the chilly winter season, meanwhile her lover doing his damnedest to make her stay? Of course, in the end she gives in, but that playful back-and-forth banter is just magical! Damn near perfect.

6) Bing Crosby - White Christmas: Ah, Bing! There's something about the crooners at Christmastime that fills one's heart with that love and cheer. Of course, Bing Crosby is at the top of this list with two classic holiday movies: Holiday Inn & White Christmas....both having performances of the latter's title. For those who have never experienced a Christmas with snow....you're missing out on one of the key elements of what makes this holiday so special to many. It's more than just the presents, the tree, and sharing time with loved ones....it's also about the perfect setting for such a warm & loving season.

7) John & Yoko & The Plastic Ono Band - Happy Xmas (War is Over): What kind of Beatles fan would I be if this song was not included on my list? Aside from that fact, this song is awesome. The full band performing, the talent, and more importantly, those iconic words: war is over....if you want it. John & Yoko were truly onto something when they wanted to spread the message of love and peace in the world. If we want something to begin or end, we need to be that change in the world. A truly powerful and profound message to share during the holiday season.

8) Frank Sinatra - I'll Be Home For Christmas: Yes, trigger the waterworks....but what a beautifully crafted song to shed a tear for. Someone singing that even if they can't be where they'd like to be for Christmas, they're there in spirit regardless.

9) Alvin & The Chipmunks - Christmas Don't Be Late: For all of the romance, you sometimes need one completely cheesy and child-like song for the Christmas season. Enter Alvin & The Chipmunks with one of the best songs about toys and hoping that their favorite holiday arrives right on time! (Side note: yes....I even make the 'hula hoop' motion in time with the song.)

10) Johnny Marks (Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer) - The Most Wonderful Day of The Year: Last, but certainly not least....another song to bring back those vivid childhood memories! With what other song could you sing about spotted elephants and misfit toys? But in the end, the message is clear: at Christmas, even the misfit toys are important, because there will always be someone grateful to have them.

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And so, in the spirit of the holidays, I wish you all a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and Happy Holidays! Never forget that this season is important in remembering to share love, joy & laughter with those nearest and dearest to you.

~Jenny Rockstar

Accomplishing the possimpible....

2010-12-18T13:27:00.000-05:00

I started thinking about this past year in reference to my personal goals. While the year itself has been one of great change and many wonderful memories made, I realize that when it comes to my own personal goals....I probably didn't achieve nearly as many as I had wanted to.

I've always been taught that patience is a virtue when it comes to achieving goals, but even more importantly, taking that first step towards them needs to happen as well. So, in an effort to push toward my personal goals, I decided to list them. Enough is enough....I need to stop letting myself down and start pushing myself forward more! I'm tired of disappointment and hurt....it's time to keep up the joy and happiness in my life.

1) Write for a website other than my own blog.

2) Continue to seek out new and interesting music....and write about it.

3) Take more walks on the boardwalk (even during the chilly months)....preferably with headphones.

4) Continue to write my book of letters to people that inspire me.

5) Take more pictures outside of shows.

6) Make peace with my fears.

7) Enroll in a college course....monetarily permitting.

8) Learn a new language (or brush up on a previously learned one).

9) Try to cook more ethnic dishes.

10) Write snail mail letters to a friend (or two).

11) Go back to California....Los Angeles (monetarily permitting).

12) Visit New York City more.

13) Visit Philadelphia.

14) Read more books.

15) Have more coffeehouse outings.

16) Keep pushing through my music project....and write more about it.

17) Stop feeling sad when people push me out of their big picture. (Because there are plenty of people who want to include me in theirs.)

18) Get onstage and sing a song with a band....at least once.

19) Get married and have children (not necessarily anytime soon, but in the future).

20) Go skydiving.

21) Take more random day trips....preferably with company.

22) Be more daring in what I decide to write about.

23) Save money.

24) Piece together my family history and learn more about my heritage.

25) Try snowboarding.

26) Find at least ten reasons to smile every day.

27) Learn how to play guitar.

28) Write more poetry.

29) Forgive more to those who deserve to be forgiven.

30) Never stop adding new things to accomplish in life.

~Jenny Rockstar

A picture is worth more than just words....

2010-12-14T13:49:00.000-05:00

When Matt and I moved into our own place back in 2009, we did everything we could to make it cozy. Little knick-knacks here and there around the apartment, replacing the bedding with ours, and a TON of pictures scattered on tables and walls to remind us of how blessed we are. As an added bonus, since we also had a blank fridge as a sort of canvas, we put up a collage of pictures....showcasing our year in review. Lots of those pictures were of friends and moments that we treasure more than anything else. Because let's face it, what would life be without those wonderful memories?

Last year's pictures were full of Tiki Bar moments, meeting new friends, being surprised by old friends, and even one full band picture to complete the spread! Every time we looked at our fridge, we could reminisce on those memories and relive them through stories. When we had to vacate our home during the summer for 6 weeks as it became a vacation rental, all of those pictures were taken down and put away for safe keeping.

When the summer season ended and we were able to move back in, the same routine was performed: everything going back into its place and making our apartment feel just as cozy. But with time, however, came new memories and moments to share....which made the pictures we had put up last year a little bit old. And so, the task of flipping through my archives and carefully selecting new photos to arrange in a collage.

As I took to the task, I couldn't help but smile at this past year. While there were quite a few less pictures of certain friends, the new friends (and returning friends) that came into the picture filled those gaps! Different experiences developed, new friendships forged strong, people leaving (and returning), and moments that seemed almost impossible happened. 2010 had become the year to blast previous years out of the water!

With a new collage completed and new packets of pictures to admire, I grabbed my camera to capture the completed project....posting to Facebook, of course. It's important to share what's truly important in life: the people who help to make you who you are. True, there are many that venture through their journeys alone, yet it is those who you encounter along that path that shape you. I hope that everyone can be as proud of the people in their life as Matt and I are of the people in ours.

~Jenny Rockstar

War is over....if you want it....a tribute

2010-12-08T21:40:00.000-05:00

Thirty years ago today, the world lost what I believe to be one of the most influential and brilliant individuals: John Lennon. While I may not have even been a gleam in my parent's eyes when his life was so brutally taken from him, his music and life has inspired me just the same.

Like George, John inspired me musically....just in different ways. He inspired me to keep performing even when I felt like stopping. His music made my days just a little brighter....words that seemed to bring people together.

I can still remember performing "Imagine" for my Senior Year piano recital (and freshman year spring recital.) When I performed that song, it was almost as though it wasn't me playing....it was like John was there with me, proud that I was sharing his message with the audience. Those moments have meant more to me than anyone knows and so in John's memory, here are the words to one of his greatest songs:

Imagine by John Lennon

Imagine there's no Heaven

It's easy if you try

No hell below us

Above us only sky

Imagine all the people

Living for today

Imagine there's no countries

It isn't hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for

And no religion too

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions

I wonder if you can

No need for greed or hunger

A brotherhood of man

Imagine all the people

Sharing all the world

You may say that I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will live as one

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Thank you for sharing your gifts with us, John. Your memory and message still lives on, even after 30 years.

~Jenny Rockstar

Life in 27 random facts....

2010-12-05T12:11:00.000-05:00

With my birthday only days away, I started thinking about this past year and just how much I've changed. There's definitely been a lot of change happening lately. Frankly, I don't think it has even taken a chance to stop in these past few years.

But I have found that despite all of that change....I have never felt more like myself than I do now. I have a wonderful boyfriend, a loving home & an incredible friend/family base that reminds me of my worth. As far as writing, while I may endure spells of "writer's block", I write whenever the mood strikes me. My music journey is still going strong, even though I haven't written much about it....and my music collection has expanded into different sub-genres. Overall, my many quirks and interests continue to flourish, but also evolve and change with time.

I feel grounded, more complete in a way than I felt through most of my life & sure that where I am now is where I need to be. That being said, I decided as a treat away from examining music and such, I'd re-do an oldie, but goodie. Almost two years ago, I wrote about "25 Things That Not Many People Know About Me"....which seemed to be more emotional and serious than fun. This time, I wanted to share more fun and less serious, and as an added bonus, make it 27 for the age I am turning....just for fun!

1) When driving to work, I always need to listen to my Glee mixes. It's become so much of a habit that I'm sure soon enough, I will have to make new copies of those mixes for my morning commutes. Something about those songs makes me feel so alive and jubilant....ready to face the day ahead.

2) Cleaning is like a drug to me. Sometimes I can handle a messy house, but I really love putting on my oldest pair of shorts and a tanktop, pulling my hair back and tackling the chore of making the house look perfect! When it's all done, I feel I have accomplished something important.

3) My family makes their own wine....and I love being involved! It's fun to try something I had never thought of doing before and finding pleasure in the results, with some delicious wine!

4) I love shopping for house items just as much as I love shopping for clothes, books, and electronics! Finding cute little kitchen items like a can opener or a cheese grater get me excited about cooking and what we could make when Matt & I need to use those items.

5) Laundry may just be one of my favorite things to do, especially when washing blankets, bedding, and towels. There's no better feeling after a long day than going under the covers and smelling the fresh scent on my pillowcase.

6) New York City will always be one of my favorite places to visit! I love the way the city comes alive the more you stop and look around. The hustle & bustle of it all never bothers me, nor do the bright lights and sounds of music coming from the subway....almost like the city has its own personality.

7) I am, and always will be, the eternal optimist. Yes, I was depressed for several years, but I still held onto the hope that things would get better....and they have. Life is too short to be miserable all the time, especially when there are so many wonderful things in the world!

8) I love using all of my senses! Strange, yes, but is there anything better than that first bite of a delicious meal, the smell of your favorite perfume lingering in the air, or the feel of bedding on freshly shaved legs? Oh yeah, I can proudly admit that I relish the use of those senses every single day.

9) Whenever I am alone with my iPod, strange dancing occurs. I don't care how I look or what I'm doing, but I'm totally in the zone with my music....even with showtunes!

10) This is not really much of a secret, but I have a slight obsession with The Monkees. I love the show, their music & I have met Peter Tork at least three or four times. This love for a fictitious-turned-actual band has gotten me through things like my parent's divorce and my senior year of high school.

11) One day, I hope to own either a pair of Christian Louboutin or Manolo Blahniks. I've never owned an expensive pair of shoes and at least at one point in my life, I'd love to own something that expensive and beautiful.

12) I usually have a great sense of things to come. Like the upcoming year, for example....I feel that a great change in my life is coming and it's going to take me places that I've never dreamed of. Not quite there yet, but I know it's so close that I can almost touch it.

13) When it comes to celebrity crushes, I have a particular taste. I have never thought Brad Pitt was hot (except in Troy) and Orlando Bloom does nothing for me. But give me George Clooney, Johnny Depp, Cory Monteith, or pretty much any man that has that "classic" look and can rock a suit? I melt instantly. (It also doesn't hurt when they know how to play an instrument!)

14) I read fanfiction. I love the way other people take characters from a show and really take the time to develop their relationships with other characters in different ways. If this makes me a dork, I don't care.

15) I LOVE singing loudly to whatever music I have playing in my car! I'm pretty sure I've amused (or scared) many drivers who watch me as I make my steering wheel a drum kit and rock out to the radio, mixed cds, etc. Can't do it half-assed, you know.

16) More than anything, I think of myself as someone who loves the classics, whether it be in TV/Movies, clothing, style, or music, I find vintage or classic much more appealing.

17) Even though I'm going to be 27 years old, I still have to watch the Thanksgiving Day Parade to see Santa Claus. I always enjoy seeing what Macys has come up with every year in the way of floats & performances.

18) I'm a big kid....seriously. Cartoons, slinkies, finger painting....I love that feeling of just immersing myself in childhood fancies. When I have kids, I plan on sharing all of my childhood loves with them (and even being a part of it!) I hope I never lose this quality.

19) I keep a pack of Dentyne gum in a memory box I own. While it is probably stale as hell right now, every time I smell it, I think of my grandmother and it makes me smile.

20) On a whim, I signed myself up for a travel filmmaking course through the Travel Channel Academy. For 4 days, I had the opportunity to learn more about video cameras, as well as meet some of the most intriguing/wonderful people. In a way, it changed my life more than anyone realizes. To this day, I still keep in touch with at least one or two of them.

21) If I wasn't such a HUGE fan of New York City, I'd probably head out to California. Being there is like a second home to me....plus, I love the ocean more than words can say. (If anyone wants to buy me a plane ticket to visit, I'd love you forever!)

22) I would love to go on an actual picnic one day, complete with basket and blanket....in Central Park. What can I say, I'm a sucker for romance?

23) If I had to pick a favorite holiday, it would have to be Christmas. I love the feeling I get when getting gifts for others, decorating the tree, being surrounded by friends & loved ones, and indulging in all of the music/movies that I can!

24) I am SUPER adventurous when it comes to food. My 14th birthday was at an Indian restaurant....my 15th was a French culinary experience. My father always reminded me that I had to try something once and if I didn't like it, I didn't have to eat it again. So far, there have been very few things that I put on the "never eat again" list.

25) I will buy super cheesy/horrible movies if they have one of my favorite actors/actresses in them. In fact, I could probably dedicate a portion of my movie collection to that very theme. (Case in point: Hybrid starring Cory Monteith.)

26) I am particular to the spelling of my first name. It is two n's, not one. Whenever someone writes "Jen," I equate the feeling I get to nails on a chalkboard. (I've gotten better as the years have gone by, but it's still an old habit!)

27) I know there are people out there who judge and make fun of me....but I don't care. Because while they still feel the need to rip me down, I'm at least secure with who I am and I'm sure that they hate me for that. I will never change though....it's far more important to be yourself in a world that wants you to be someone else.

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In the spirit of my birthday, I look back at 26 as yet another wonderful year of memories! 27....you have your work cut out for you.

~Jenny Rockstar

It's Not Always Going To Be This Gray....

2010-11-29T20:02:00.000-05:00

When I was a freshman in college, my father was the one to break the news to me about the passing of George Harrison. And while only moments prior to his call I was enjoying a blissful slumber, these very words shook me to the core. My favorite Beatle, the one affectionately known as "The Dark Horse," had lost his battle with cancer.

When I had begun to really get into The Beatles, I had started with a love for John Lennon. (And don't worry, when December 8th rolls around, I will dedicate a blog entry to him as well.) But while my love started with Lennon, it was when I heard Something that I fell in love with George Harrison. He was not known for his lyrical skills or a perfect singing voice, yet what I loved was his ability to make you listen when he performed. His songwriting chops improved as the years went on, with Something being recognized as one of the greatest love songs of all time.

His guitar playing was magical, in more ways than I can even describe. His charm and subtle wit....endearing. George inspired me so much in my life that I remember writing one of my college papers about the progression of his music from the Beatles to All Things Must Pass, his debut solo album. Which brings to me to today, the 9-year anniversary of his death. When he first passed, I played his music as much as possible, wanting to share my love for George with everyone around me.

Keeping in the spirit of things, here are the words to one of George Harrison's greatest songs: All Things Must Pass. I think it is most fitting in moments like these, where one realizes that no matter what happens in life, everything will pass, including life.

R.I.P. George....even now, your music still inspires and moves me in everything I do. You will never be forgotten.

All Things Must Pass

Sunrise doesn't last all morning,
a cloudburst doesn't last all day.
Seems my love is up
and has left you with no warning.
It's not always going to be this grey.

All things must pass,
all things must pass away.

Sunset doesn't last all evening,
a mind can blow those clouds away.
after all this my love is up
and must be leaving.
It's not always going to be this grey.

All things must pass,
all things must pass away.

All things must pass
none of life's strings can last.
So I must be on my way,
face another day.

Darkness only stays at nighttime,
in the morning it will fade away.
Daylight has a habit of arriving at the right time.
It's not always going to be this grey.

All things must pass,
all things must pass away.
All things must pass,
all things must pass away.

~Jenny Rockstar

Being Thankful....

2010-11-24T13:23:00.000-05:00

With Thanksgiving on the horizon, it occurred to me today that this year has been one of many reasons to be thankful. Sure, every year I will always be thankful for the people I have met and memories I have made, yet this year has definitely been one to top the charts!

Each year, I am always thankful for friends, family, and (for almost three years now) the most wonderful boyfriend I could have ever asked for.

I am thankful for the love in my life. It genuinely feels incredible to have that feeling of being loved every single day! (And to share that love with those around me.)

I am thankful to have someone in my life with which I can share everything. Not everyone finds their best friend/love of their life as quickly as I have.

I am thankful for the smiles, the laughter, and the love that occurs in my life on a daily basis. Without those, I don't know how I'd make it through life day to day.

I am thankful for a good book to read, a great album to listen to, and a movie that can make feel the emotions of the characters in that moment.

I am thankful for the ability to smell the saltwater in the air, the feeling of the sand in my toes, and hear the roar of the waves as it crashes into the surf.

I am thankful for those moments that take my breath away, which seem to be happening even more now than ever.

I am thankful to be in a job that allows me the chance to share a smile and friendship (and possibly a drink or two) with some wonderful co-workers.

I am thankful for opportunities that bring me closer to my dreams, no matter how big or small those opportunities may be. Each one is a step in the right direction.

I am thankful for meeting new people and forming new relationships, as well as having the opportunity to experience those relationships which have faded through the years. Each person you meet will impact your life in ways that you cannot even imagine.

I am thankful for knowing the meaning of "fortunate" by having a roof over my head, a clean bill of health, a car to drive, a warm bed to sleep in, food in my belly, and the clothes on my back.

I am thankful for what I have learned from the past and all of the wonderful/exciting things that the future will bring.

While the list could go on and on, most importantly, I'm thankful for my life. It has taken me a long time to get here, but I wouldn't trade this life for all the traveling and riches of the world. At the end of the day, true riches remain with the people who care about you, not what you own or what you've had the chance to see in your lifetime. And the stories that I have to share from my life? Completely epic.

And so, I hope everyone has a very Happy Thanksgiving, wherever you are. Eat lots of food tomorrow, drink to your heart's content, and remember to be appreciative of everything you have in your life....very few are as lucky as you and me.

~Jenny Rockstar

In the Witching Hour.....

2010-10-31T22:41:00.000-04:00

With Halloween in full swing, I've begun my "ritual" in celebration of the holiday.

Instead of my favorite cheesy chick flicks being in rotation, I pop on AMC's FearFest for some Wolf Man and Frankenstein.

In the car, my stereo blasts the Rocky Horror Picture Show soundtrack and I sing "Dammit Janet" at the top of my lungs....many people in their cars probably questioning my sanity when they catch me in the act.

I could handle some Nosferatu with a big bowl of popcorn, some Lindt chocolate truffles, and a glass of red wine.

And every paranormal investigation show replaces my usual Family Guy lineup.

Yes, Halloween is definitely one of my all-time favorite holidays....one where I spend as much time as possible trying to scare the shit out of myself with anything and everything abnormal.

So in honor of this ghoulish holiday, I have decided to add my favorite Halloween songs to listen to as I bring in the holiday.

1) Thriller by Michael Jackson - So it would only be fitting that MJ grace my list with this classic....and this one is no exception! I mean, come on now, the music video alone speaks for the song, with a Wolf Man scene, zombies, and that ever-famous zombie dancing. While it has been years since I've done the famous dance scene for anyone, I can't help but want to turn this song up whenever those opening notes arouse my aural senses.

2) Poltergeist (Main Title) Theme Song by Jerry Goldsmith - The child-like music, those melodic voices....all topped off with creepy, ominous laughter? There is truly nothing more disturbing than this particular movie theme song.

3) Monster Mash by Bobby "Boris" Pickett - A classic! Anywhere I go, the moment this song comes on, I just have to bop around (even in my car) and sing at the top of my lungs (room permitting). (And sometimes, I wish I could even show off my version of the "Transylvania Twist"!)

4) Time Warp by Richard O'Brien (Rocky Horror Picture Show) - I can remember the first time I watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I could not have been more than seven or eight years old when the image of Tim Curry in fishnets and pearls was burned into my memory. Since then, add many a midnight showing complete with perfecting the choreography to this song....absolute perfection!

5) The Shining Theme Song (Dies Irae) by Hector Berlioz - For The Shining, it's not all about watching Jack Nicholson go completely mad! No, I find it even more frightening the way the opening scene captures the isolation of the family as they spend the winter at the Overlook Hotel. And for the initial panning of the camera, the use of one of Berlioz's most famous pieces....brilliant!

6) Purple People Eater by Sheb Wooley - What a weird, yet hysterical musical number! I don't think there are even words to describe how much Purple People Eater makes me laugh every time I hear it.

7) Ghostbusters Theme Song by Ray Parker - I think my favorite memory of this song was being in a dive bar in the Village and having a Marine pick this particular number on the jukebox....all in honor of Bill Murray being in the bar that night. There are no words to the amount of "cheese" this song embodies, but it is still pretty damn catchy! Just keep remembering to ask yourself....who you gonna call?

8) Twilight Zone Theme Song by Marius Constant - A simple, ominous melody, interjected with Rod Serling's even creepier voice? Even though I won't be able to watch this particular marathon until New Year's Eve....I still cannot help but place this classic on my list.

9) Werewolves of London by Warren Zevon - Not exactly created for Halloween, but come now....what could be better than some Warren Zevon jamming out and singing about werewolves? Definitely a classic.

10) Psycho Theme Song by Bernard Herrmann - This movie gives me the creeps....in so many ways. Because while Janet Leigh's character is worried about being caught with all of that money, she has no clue that she has stumbled onto the craziest person of all....Norman Bates. And for this movie, the music needed to be perfect in the portrayal of the story. The violins and their creepy melody are what help to make Hitchcock's classic go from creepy to just downright disturbing!

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There you have it, my favorite Halloween music picks....and on that note, hope everyone has had one killer Halloween!

~Jenny Rockstar

Sometimes....you just gotta let it all out

2010-10-21T21:46:00.001-04:00

Let's face it: we all have bad days. It's true that when you're happy the smallest things can always keep that happiness going. But then....there are those days where everything seems to go wrong and all you want is a box of tissues and a pint of Haagen Daz. (Or a punching bag and a desire to have a lobotomy from all the stupidity you've encountered.) And when that happens, all the happy, motivational music doesn't seem to quite cut it. You're angry, upset, tearful, numb, and feeling empty (even when surrounded by loved ones.)

But in those times, I still find music to be just as important in keeping me grounded and sane while I process my emotions. Whether it be loud and obnoxious, full of hateful words, empowering, or sad and melancholy, I need those songs to bring my head to a better place to fully process what I'm feeling. So here they are, in no particular order, ten of my go-to songs for when I'm feeling a little less like myself.

1) Points of Authority by Linkin Park - If we want to talk angry and hate-filled, this is my go-to song in those moments. I almost feel like in that exact moment, those words sum up all the rage I have inside, no matter what the situation. Just the way the lyrics are spoken with such intensity and malice, I can relate in those moments when I just can't take anymore. The way Mike Shinoda sings "forfeit the game before somebody else takes you out of the frame" makes me feel liberated and alive inside, like I can intimidate those who are screwing with my mind. And sometimes, you need to feel that empowerment more than anything in order to cope.

2) What Goes Around, Comes Around by Justin Timberlake - Yes, this may be a little more pop-like for this list, but hearing Justin sing about a girl who wronged him and how karma comes back to bite her in the ass....who hasn't been in a situation where you feel this way about someone else? It's just such a powerful song in its message that while you can be hurt, life will take care of those who have wronged you. Karma will always take care of it.

3) Bigger Than My Body by John Mayer - Even when angry music has taken over my playlist, this John Mayer gem always brings me back to being as positive as possible in times of need. Sometimes we can reach beyond what we're ready to reach for....and hearing this song reminds me that while I'm not ready to reach for what I want yet, it doesn't mean that I'm too far off from achieving my goal. I will get there. I will reach my goal. It just may take a little more than what I've given already....and that's ok.

4) Bodies by Drowning Pool - Oh yes, even my collection of music includes this angry, hateful song. Why? Because sometimes, you just need to scream in song about how you feel about getting pushed around again and again. I can remember friends cracking jokes about this song (that are not quite appropriate to say in a public forum), but I always give this song a listen when nothing else is allowing me to quite express the anger that I'm carrying inside.

5) Sleep to Dream by Fiona Apple - I have always considered Fiona Apple to be great music to listen to when I just need a good cry. Some of her music is depressing and can always bring me down to its level when I need to let out my melancholy. But there's just something about her music, especially this song, that helps me cope with people who I care about that walk all over me.

6) Gives You Hell by The All-American Rejects - A newer addition to my music collection, yet this song struck a chord with me the first time I heard it. I love how the words are an expression of one person telling the other that they hope that whenever they are thought about, that it makes them suffer just a little bit.

7) Kim by Eminem - For anyone that has heard this song, you understand how disturbing this one can truly be. Eminem takes it beyond everything by writing a song about killing his woman because she cheated on him. And when I say disturbing, I mean disturbing to even using the sound effects of him dragging her dead body back to the car and throwing it in the trunk. You hear her crying and desperate for him to spare her life, but he won't hear any of it! And while it's normally not what I listen to all the time, it helps release that anger that can bottle up every now and then.

8) Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit - Fairly self-explanatory if you listen to the words. Yet for those who have not heard it, I do think you should locate this track on a bad day and hit "play"....and listen to Fred Durst go on about how we all have those horrible days where our anger gets the better of us and we need to just break something to feel better.

9) Smile by Charlie Chaplin - Ok, so I haven't heard the original version, but the words to this song? Beautiful. Amidst all the angry music, there needs to be encouragement and hope somewhere. And what better way to capture that motivation than by a song that talks about smiling despite all the pain you feel? That smiling will always get you through, no matter how difficult the situation you find yourself in.

10) What It Feels Like For A Girl by Madonna - So I know the real subtext of these words are not directly about how boys need to put themselves into a girl's shoes, but I can't help but feel a connection with this song. Sometimes, I wish that boys knew how I felt inside about what happens to me on a day-to-day basis. How girls struggle with so many more issues, because they're under pressure for the image they portray to the world. We're more in touch with our feelings and are taught that to not show emotion is a bad thing. It's raw, it's emotional and it fits the mood of how I feel most of the time....misunderstood and alone.

~Jenny Rockstar

Pre-Order Mark Salling's album Pipe Dreams!

2010-10-06T16:56:00.000-04:00

Hey everyone! Check out Mark Salling's debut album Pipe Dreams when it hits the airwaves 10/26, but be sure to click on the link below and pre-order your album!

@mark_salling's album Pipe Dreams is available for pre-order now!

~Jenny Rockstar

Enter for a chance to get a 10 minute phone call with Mark Salling!

2010-10-06T16:40:00.000-04:00

Hey everyone! Check out this link and help me win a 10-minute phone interview with Glee's star Mark Salling!

Also, check out his new album Pipe Dreams when it hits the airwaves 10/26!

Enter for a chance to get a 10 minute phone call with Mark Salling!

~Jenny Rockstar

Have A Little Faith In Me....

2010-10-05T21:55:00.000-04:00

As I have found very little time between my photography job, my other side-jobs, and making sure to live my life....writing has taken the backseat to what's been going on in my life. But something tonight finally jolted me out of my hiatus and so I felt the need to update.

Yes, I am still working on my music project, even more diligently than ever as I have started to download and add some of my new music to my iTunes collection! The musical journey has taught me a lot about myself and what I'm looking for in life, but I digress. Tonight, as I cozied up on the couch with Matt and watched tonight's new episode of Glee....I couldn't help but be drawn to the topic at hand: Faith.

In the episode, it deals with faith and how each person believes in something different....even if nothing at all. The members of the glee club each express what faith means to them, whether it be through going to Temple, Church, or praying to a grilled cheese sandwich with the face of Jesus burned onto it. Point being, each person had their own belief of what faith and spirituality meant to them, even if they didn't have any at all.

There are times that I can relate to Kurt's character, where I don't necessarily believe in there being a structured higher power to believe in. Instead, feeling that a belief in a higher power is just something that makes people sleep better at night. I know not everyone will understand what I mean by that and attack my previous statement, but I don't care. I believe in a God that I can talk to whenever I want to, share whatever I believe in, and I don't feel pressured to be in a cookie-cutter type of religion. But I do respect other religions and beliefs, even if it's not what I necessarily agree with. It's pertinent to always have faith in something, even if it is only yourself.

With that said, the episode got me thinking about Faith in my own life and where it lies now. I still have my random conversations with God whenever I feel I need to talk out life....good or bad. And it got me thinking about the ways I view music and writing. Music has become part of my own faith, giving me the strength to keep going on a daily basis, as well as keep my life in focus. It's a part of who I am and what I believe in. But writing? I never make more time for it....and that's where I falter.

In an effort to truly devote myself more to my "faith," I need to make more time for my writing. Instead of holding out for two weeks to write another entry, I need to push myself harder to write weekly, sometimes twice a week. It'll give me peace of mind, it'll keep me grounded. And most important, it'll keep my faith in check.

So for now, I bid you all goodnight; I will be back to updating musically very soon!

~Jenny Rockstar

Feelin' the Glee

2010-09-21T19:59:00.000-04:00

If you haven't noticed, I am big fan of the show Glee. Most people may see it as a teeny-bopper type of show about a Glee Club....but to me, I love the storyline, the characters, and of course, the music! (Whenever it comes on, I feel like I become 16 years old all over again and giggle just like a schoolgirl!) The music in itself is amazing....so much so that I am always wondering who arranges those show-stoppers. (For the record, it's Adam Anders.)

This show has reminded me of the importance of music and reaching for my goals in life, two things I am finally finding my way with right now. Having that constant reminder that being a part of something special makes you special, I take those words to heart when I encounter new goals and projects in my life. And so far, the ride has been spectacular!

But putting all of that aside, I decided as a treat with the season premiere coming up, this week's top ten are the songs that I think would be great to hear on the show Glee. And in addition to adding those songs, who I think should sing them and a little explanation as to why.

1) Cowboy by Kid Rock - I think it goes without saying that this just screams Puck! First off, he has that whole badass persona to keep up, as well as looking sexy with a guitar. We saw the more tender side last season with Beth and his affection towards Quinn....but I think I miss the rough and tumble side of Puck! Definitely need to stop showing all this affection and get back to what really makes his character so damn awesome to begin with. And who better to channel that badassness through this song but him?

2) Lucky by Jason Mraz & Colbie Caillat - Even though they have sang sooooo many of the duets, what's one more to add to Finn/Rachel list? This song. As they get older, there's going to be college searches and possible long-distance relationships. I don't necessarily see Finn in NYC with Rachel when they both go to college, but I do see a lot of working Therefore, this song is a perfect fit for the slightly mismatched, yet perfect pair. (On a side note, I did hear that this one is possibly being used in an upcoming episode....just not with Finn and Rachel singing it.)

3) She's Out Of My Life by Michael Jackson - Will seems to always have a pull to Emma in the show, but I wonder what he would sing if he didn't end up with Emma? Well, at least in the beginning of this season anyway. And this song popped into my head. Emma seems adamant about being in this new relationship with her dentist and instead of shying away from it, I see her moving towards it. I want to see Will regretting some of his previous decisions with women and really understanding what it means to have Emma gone. Not to mention, this song is absolutely amazing.

4) Picture by Kid Rock & Sheryl Crow - Tina & Artie are not given as much face time as the other big Glee couples, but their relationship is certainly an interesting one as well. It makes me a little sad that I will not see them together at the beginning of this season (due to Artie's lack of performing boyfriend duties), but I have hope for them yet. So in turn, when both of them are trying to be with different people to give one another space, I would love to see Tina & Artie have a moment of clarity that all they want is one another. And what better way for it to happen but when they come across a memory that makes them reconsider their feelings?

5) Natural Woman by Aretha Franklin - I love Mercedes and her powerhouse voice! And I wanna hear more "Chocolate Thunder" in this upcoming season, which is where this jewel comes from. Mercedes should find her way into a relationship and sing this song about said male suitor. I want to see her diva side come out in a subtler way....singing about a man who makes her feel like she can be exactly who she is. We see her pursue her fashionable male BFF and then be pursued by a womanizing smooth-talker. I would love to see the other characters on the show, like Mercedes, be in positive relationships.

6) I Wish The Best For You by Emerson Hart - Finn & Quinn's relationship should be addressed this season....gain the closure that it so desperately needs. Because when it comes to these two, we didn't really see them interact after everything happened with the Quinn/Puck betrayal. In Glee Club, they barely said two words to one another and even less outside of the club. With the previews that have shown Quinn trying to pursue Finn, it got me thinking about how there is still lots of tension between these two....and it should be resolved through song.

7) You've Got A Friend by James Taylor - Ah, yes! A cheesy, but amazing group number for the club....one that focuses on how no matter what happens, they are friends. And come on, it's James Taylor! Need I say more?

8) Piece of My Heart by Janis Joplin - Quinn is not featured in the songs nearly as much as she should, but I would really love to see her breakout and get a little more rockified with this number. And Janis couldn't say it any better! She seems to be going through a lot of transitions in this show, from Finn to Puck and having to deal with her feelings on the both of them. I'm sure she still has feelings for Finn, despite her cheating, and for Puck, despite his player ways. I feel like she should reach the point where enough is enough and she just sings about the guys in her life just breaking her heart....urging them to just go through with it and toughen her up even more.

9) The Only Exception by Paramore - Santana always tends to come off as a bitch on the show, yet I would like to see a little more humanity from her. I'm sure the whole Quinn/Puck ordeal really bothers her, especially since she has had quite a few trysts with Puck throughout the season. Therefore, this song has caught my attention....yet maybe not for her to sing to Puck. There's so much talk about Santana and Brittany and their relationship, why not have this song as a way for Santana to express to Brittany how despite how much she refuses to let others in, Brittany is the only one who really sees her for who she is.

10) I'm Not Okay (I Promise) by My Chemical Romance - This last one was really difficult to come up with, but still an important one all the same. I always see Kurt getting kicked down and frustrated with life, so I think he needs to break out of his shell and really speak out on how he feels! It would be a major deviation from his normal repertoire, but I really believe he could pull the song off with class and vigor!

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Glee is an iconic show of our time. Here's to another two seasons of epic characters, storylines, and of course, music!

~Jenny Rockstar

what do you say to giving second chances....

2010-09-20T18:28:00.000-04:00

Let's get one thing straight: when it's comes to music that sounds like it uses quite a bit of synthesizers and technology....it is a major turn-off. Frankly, I abhor it, because real music to me uses real instruments and has a more garage-like feel. Or at least that's how I feel when it comes to rock. It's probably why I am deeply attracted to the classic rock era of music....it's the closest to raw talent that I have listened to in a while.

So it surprised me when my fave fab NYC couple Team Stewart presented me with the album suggestion Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix by Phoenix. Definitely listening to my ideas of breaking out of my proverbial music shell, I diligently searched through YouTube archives to locate the suggested songs. Before the experience, I was super reluctant to give this album a try, as I would continually pass over it when I saw it on the racks at Target. Nothing about the album grabbed me....not even the rather plain album cover. Yes, in this instance, before even giving the band a chance, I automatically wrote them off as one of those emo bands with which they shared the shelf.

But in an effort to keep up with my musical journey, I gave the band a listen while I caught up on my e-mails and Facebook updates. What surprised me the most while the faint strains of "Lisztomania" came through my computer speakers was an electronic/rock feel that the music seemed to embody. As I stated earlier, I don't really care for such an over-produced sound....yet I started to really enjoy the music. It has more than just that synthesized feel, more than just a bunch of produced sounds used to create something enjoyable....there is an element of actual instrumentation mixed in with all the technology.

Kinda excited about the first selection, I promptly located the next selection they gave me, "1901," and clicked play. Even more interesting was that I thoroughly enjoyed the second selection as well....making me excited for finding "Fences" and playing that selection as well. Of course, I was just as surprised at that song as I was with the previous two....especially since all songs used an element of music that I never really considered "music" before!

After giving the three selections a listen, I realized the importance of learning more about the different genres of music. It is imperative to give every type of music some sort of chance before you give up on it. A 'second chance,' if you will. Even though I found a more technologically produced sound to be not as aesthetically pleasing to the ear....adding in that element of actual instrumentation created a sound that surprised and intrigued me. In general, the music definitely reflected Team Stewart....a fashionista-type of garage rock. (So much so that I have purchased the album and it has been in heavy rotation in my car's cd player!)

Music....can certainly surprise you. In ways that make you feel almost blind-sided and thrown. But I enjoy the feeling, because sometimes being pleasantly surprised makes you start to appreciate what you're listening to. Even contemplating giving a particular genre of music another chance, that's truly magical.

~Jenny Rockstar

Sometimes sharing really means more than caring....

2010-09-12T12:52:00.001-04:00

It has been said that journeys are often more enjoyable when you have someone to share it with.......

Now, whether or not I agree with that statement is questionable. I think it really depends on what kind of journey one is taking. If it's one of self-reflection....maybe that's better left for just yourself. Sometimes, it's important to keep some experiences just for yourself, so you can remember just how hard you worked alone on that solo path to reach the destination. But not all journeys are better left for one person. When there are those moments that you watch a sunrise or see something mind-blowing occur, it's always nice to be there with another person who takes in that very moment with you.

So far, my music experiences have been best shared with friends and loved ones. I can remember excursions in college to many live shows, being handed an album by a band that I had never heard of (and being told to listen to it), even educating those around me about new music for them to include in their own collection.

As I continue down this musical journey that I started, what I've enjoyed is that even though I sometimes take the path alone, I have even more points along the way where I can share more than just my feelings on the music with everyone....I can share the experience itself.

While Matt has contributed a few suggestions of his own, he became interested in my project when he read a few of the suggestions that I had come across....especially one that he had given me on a whim. During the summer, while performing a solo show at a country club, one drunken bar patron had requested to hear the song Taxi by Harry Chapin. Not knowing the song and still in the middle of performing Cat's in the Cradle, Matt tried to appease the patron to the best of his ability, assuring he would learn it if there was time.

Later on, as we drove home, that very request came up in conversation. I had never heard the song before. Hell, I knew next to nothing about Harry Chapin! His music has never made it onto my ipod, nor did I care enough to learn more about him. Then again, a lot of the music that has been given to me so far has been music that at one point or another, I didn't really care to know more about. So in an effort to continue expanding my musical education (as well as learn more about Harry Chapin), I added the song Taxi to my list. Hopefully, I'd get the chance to have a listen within the next few days or so. And then the funniest thing happened....

Matt offered to be there to listen to the song with me. I had spent so much time focusing on how I would react to the music that I forgot how others would interpret it. And so, on a day off from all shows and work, Matt and I sat in our apartment as I located the intended track and hit play.

The song itself is about a cab driver who inadvertently runs into a past love as his last cab ride of the night. While at first she claims not to know who he is, when she sees his face, they reminisce and talk about their lives. As Chapin continues singing, he realizes that in going their separate ways both of them changed so much in the process that years down the line, there was no hope for any reconciliation....small price to pay for pursuit of their own disillusioned dreams.

It was touching, realistic, and sad....the way most romantic relationships do end. There was no talk of closure, no epic moment. Just the idea that when you do see someone who used to know you so well, you may as well have been strangers for all the time that has passed. Because when it's all said and done, what else is there to share?

I don't know if Matt truly looked into the song for deeper meaning, but I do know that both of us really enjoyed the song at face value. Chapin's storytelling ability is quite simple and moving, which is exactly how most songs that tell a story should go. Music should not always be complicated, but sometimes share a moment with us. It can be so hard to follow and appreciate a song that doesn't have real meaning, no structure, and no sense of connection to the audience. But a story....always goes a long way.

~Jenny Rockstar

these streets will make you feel brand new, big lights will inspire you....

2010-09-11T15:11:00.000-04:00

I know I've been lax lately on the whole writing thing, but with lack of time on my hands, it's been a constant push to even have the time to write in the first place. Fortunately, with all moving done and a day to process everything that has happened in the past week, I decided to take a quick break from writing about music and talk about one of my other loves in life: New York City.

Ever since I could remember, my family would love taking trips into Manhattan and having the chance to do fun things. Whether it be a Broadway show, Rockefeller Center to see the Christmas tree, or celebrate an event with dinner, taking that 30-minute trek into the Big Apple always made me giddy with excitement and wonder. Even when I started working at Columbia Business School, I loved taking my time strolling down the streets, letting the familiar sounds of yellow cab car horns and random conversations fill me up with a sense of calm....as well as partaking in some of the most diverse cuisines one could ever find! It's like it has a personality of its very own....and when you've left it, it never leaves you.

Where else can you find Little Italy and Chinatown right next to one another?

One day, you could venture Uptown and hang around the Columbia University scene while the next, you could head down to the Village for some great dive clubs and original artists.

Attending the Ballet or an Opera can be done on short notice with a student id.

On certain days, front row tickets to a Broadway show could be trumped by eating pretzels in Central Park or walking the Brooklyn Bridge on a Sunday afternoon.

Crossing the street and walking past a celebrity or two is not uncommon.

It's a fashion mecca, a music scene, and a financial gateway all in one!

Depending on your interest, New York has a little something for everyone.

I once read somewhere that "When you leave New York, you ain't goin' nowhere." Now, for some it could mean the sense that you're leaving a place that can bring you further than any other place you've imagined, yet I take it as meaning that no matter how hard you try to walk away from it, New York tends to grow on you....always taking a piece of your heart in the process.

With that being said, last night, on kinda last minute notice, I visited a friend or two in the city for a night out. And as I boarded NJ Transit, I felt a sense of giddiness that I had not felt in a long time! It felt like I was returning to some familiar home, although that home is full of smelly garbage and people that will run you over on the sidewalk without so much as a backwards glance. But I didn't care. I felt like a kid on Christmas, surrounded by shimmering lights and the promise that maybe in my recent craziness of trying to make something of myself, I could accomplish anything that I dreamed of.

Walking those city blocks, sharing some coffee talk in one of the many Starbucks around Manhattan, pushing my way through the crowds that clamor to reach the subway stairs....I felt at home. Sure, living at the beach has become my favorite home so far, but New York City will always hold that piece of my heart. Though it can be hard, cruel, and spit you out at the mere thought of kindness, I admire its tenacity and strength to keep going. One could argue that NYC has a personality of its very own, but it's up to the person who walks through it to figure out how they mesh with it.

As a new goal for this year, I want to start spending more time in my other home. As a way to further my progress on myself, I need that sense of home to re-connect with passion and drive on new levels. It was Dr. James Hillman who wrote "you come to New York to find the ambiance that will evoke your best." Whether or not that's true, I have yet to see. But I do know one thing: I need New York to bring Jenn the writer out of her shell even more.

~Jenny Rockstar

****On a side note, I would also like to take this time to remember that today is September 11th, a day that will always ring strong with every New Yorker, American, and any individual who was affected by its impact. Even after nine years, I can still remember where I was, what I was doing, and every emotion that went through me as I struggled to deal with the repercussions of the actions. What it taught me is that no matter what people do to try and hurt us, standing up proudly against injustice and intolerance is important.

While I know that as a nation, we still struggle with Islam and the ability to see past what Bin Laden did....showing tolerance and kindness to others is more important than pointing fingers at an entire culture of individuals because of a terrorist group and their crazy leader. I'm tired of all the fighting and backlashes that 9/11 produced in the process. Why can't we, as a nation, use our mind and exercise kindness and compassion to prove that in the end, Bin Laden did not win? Showing that despite his horrible, malicious actions, we still embrace and encourage freedom to all who desire it. That is how we truly win and stand as a nation.

But today is also a time to remember those who gave their lives today. All 2,977 victims. Their memories will live on, reminding us that the cost of our freedom isn't free, yet we cannot repair the damage with lashing out at others. For any American or individual who embraces the ability to be who you want to be, stand strong today (and every day). Enjoy life to the fullest and never forget what we sacrifice and the lessons we learn from it.****

taking a page out of Julia's book....

2010-08-27T23:24:00.000-04:00

Sometimes when you take a journey of sorts, you forget to include the things that you want to learn more about, instead of just catering to the masses and being as touristy as possible. But I don't believe a journey would be a journey without a touch of self-reflection.

Initially when I started the project, I spent so much time wondering what everyone else would give me....but what about myself? I get so lost in my musical niche that I forget to include the possibility of contributing my own ideas to stops along the way. It wasn't until I was a couple days into this project that I realized I also needed to provide a challenge for myself. Music that I would enjoy learning more about, yet I never had the chance to listen to.

While watching Julie & Julia for what felt like the 50th time, I started to think about French music from the 1940's and 1950's. Sure, I do love American music from the 40's and 50's, but just the thought of music in another language, it's something I've never considered listening to until now. I didn't know where to start with it, but I figured that with a little bit of research and some time, I had a good chance of coming across something I'd enjoy.

Starting with popular movies and glancing at their soundtracks, my first toe in the water started with Charles Trenet. The first time I had watched the movie French Kiss, I fell in love with the song Verlaine by Trenet. It was the scene where Kevin Kline and Meg Ryan's characters were dancing before Ryan went to try and win her ex-boyfriend back. Getting the chance to listen to a song outside of a movie was very enlightening, as it gave me the opportunity to hear the song in its entirety. And if there's one other thing I can admit about the idea of music in another language, it's the mellow mood it creates.

From just listening to the first song, I imagined myself outside on a deck with a glass of wine and lit candles, something that I find pertinent to good music: the ability to envision a moment you'd listen to that kind of music. There's a richness and decadence that comes from listening to French singers....a quality to the music that in today's music, has pretty much vanished. Then after listening to just one song, I located another Trenet classic, La Mer. And just like with the first pick, I was able to imagine a similar scenario. It was oddly comforting, despite the fact that I had no clue what the English translation was. All I knew is that I could find balance and harmony in the music....and possibly fell a little bit in love too.

My mother was helpful in my quest for French artists, especially when I told her about my project and what I hoped to accomplish. After explaining just how beauty and endearment of Trenet's music, she told me that if I truly wanted to appreciate French music, I would need to listen to Edith Piaf. And taking her suggestion, I dove even deeper into l'amour with this stop on my path.

As I started to listen to one of Piaf's signature songs, Hymne a l'amour, it dawned on me: even in life, it's important to come out of your comfort zone. With music, my tastes may be eclectic, yet I've always been drawn to certain types of music. And in this instance, I challenged myself with music that I may have never given a chance unless I started this project. We all tend to try and stay in what we feel is comfortable and safe, with no knowledge that there could be something better out there. It's just easier to hide and not take chances.....

But what then? If you don't start something and try to see it through, you'll never learn anything. Just like Julia Child was persistent in earning her degree from Le Cordon Bleu and writing a French cookbook for Americans, I realized that my own persistence in continuing to pursue new music that I stumble upon is just as important. It helps me grow, learn more about who I am as a person, and become that person I've always known I could be. I've found new things that cause me to break free and step outside my box. I feel like it will take me exactly where I need to be in my career.

And I'm sure that by the end of all of this, my iTunes account will be full of wonderful music....and probably bankrupt me.

~Jenny Rockstar

And these highways are in so many songs........

2010-08-23T23:44:00.000-04:00

Sometimes, it's hard to place the music I've received (so far) into specific entries. Frankly, it's a challenge to which I must admit a little defeat. But it makes me grateful that some of my friends have been able to give me such interesting (and awesome) choices in new music. And so, for a little treat today, as one does when they do "sightseeing", I'm going to talk about someone who has given me more music than I know what to do with! Very much like a tour guide.

I first met Nick when Matt's band starting playing Wednesday nights during the summer at the bar/restaurant he works at. Gradually, we started joking around and talking during those Wednesday nights, yet it wasn't until this year when I found out just how much he loves music. He was one of the first people to give me suggestions for my music project and upon that initial request, has continued to send me music every few days since then. (Hell, come November, we'll be going to see Roger Waters perform The Wall at the Izod Center....talk about coincidence!)

While I had originally thought that it was going to be nothing but a classic rock experience, as he does love Pink Floyd and Billy Joel, I have found so far that most of the music that Nick has given me goes beyond what I could imagine. At first, there was some Ray LaMontagne and Jeff Buckley, two artists that I have come to enjoy listening to when I need a mellow mood for writing. Then came some Woodstock-era music with Richie Havens and Melanie, taking me back to my classic rock roots. But what really surprised me was the Rachael Yamagata and Shawn Mullins, two artists that I believe most with a Y chromosome would never really listen to.

As I kept receiving suggestion after suggestion, I gave feedback on my favorites, shared a video or two that I found, and even continued further with certain musicians that really caught me aurally. I wasn't just given a roadmap on the journey....I was handed key "sightseeing" stops along the way.

Most importantly, Nick has listened to what I was looking for and as a result, I have found a lot of new music that has made it onto my "to download" list in the future. It seems the more I continue to venture down this path, I'm finding more and more artists that I like. Music I may have never given a chance to before are going to become part of my iTunes collection in the future. (And for those interested in some interesting music, do listen to Martin Sexton while you're at it!)

But even better than that, I've learned that sometimes people surprise you with what they like. Appearances can't always tell you what music someone listens to. It requires more thought than that. Yet when you do find out about those little tidbits, you take more away from the experience that you had originally hoped. And for that, I appreciate my friend more for sharing his musical spirit.

~Jenny Rockstar

experimenting....not just for druggies

2010-08-19T19:23:00.000-04:00

The first time I had ever seen Frank Zappa, it was on an episode of The Monkees. He had made an appearance on the final episode of the show, dressed up as Mike Nesmith (with green wool cap) while Nesmith dressed up as him. At the time, I had no clue what was going on, or who Frank Zappa was. But unbeknownst to me, Zappa and Nesmith were friends at the time, which was part of the reason why he was on the show. Their mock interview ended in the trashing of a car on set, Mother People playing in the background.

Before this project, I had never bothered to listen to Frank Zappa or find out anything more about him. All I had known is that he had a guest appearance on a television show (and a movie)....and nothing more. Yet, in keeping with the importance of my project, I decided to give myself a lesson in the avant-garde. Zappa, apparently, was very well known for his interest in creating music that went beyond the norm. Using different instruments, sounds, and even stranger vocals, he captured music in a way that very few had before him.

Now with many suggesting Frank Zappa & The Mothers of Invention to me, one of my friends told me that if I really wanted to learn more about Zappa, I needed to listen to We're Only In It For The Money. So today, after collecting more "souvenirs" along my path, I decided to let go just a little and spend some time understanding the avant-garde lifestyle.

While I thought the song Revolution #9 by The Beatles was pretty far out there, it doesn't compare to Frank Zappa! Strange phrases? Check. Use of unconventional sounds? Check. Songs that string together but don't necessarily make sense? Check. For lack of better phrasing, I found Zappa to be a bit of a mind-fuck with the way he created music.

Yet, as strange as it may be, I found that Zappa created the music that he envisioned. And that is something beautiful in itself. His fascination with experimental melodies were a big thing during the 60's. The Beatles did it, The Beach Boys did it too. (In fact, the album cover for We're Only In It For The Money paid homage to The Beatles album Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.) Its success during this time helped pave the way to different harmonies and variations on what we call music today. As always, I learned something too.

Music doesn't always need to fit into a neat, harmonizing package. It doesn't need to make sense to everyone. Music can be defined differently by every person, deemed meaningful in various ways. Whether it be in the lyrics, or the singer, or even the instrumentation used. Zappa wasn't exactly one of my favorites to listen to, but I wouldn't discount him either. Because after all, he was suggested as a note-worthy artist. With that being said, another entry in my travel blog....ready to see where the next stop takes me.

~Jenny Rockstar

in the summertime......

2010-08-18T15:11:00.000-04:00

Sometimes trying to be a daily blogger on this site can be hard.......or at least that's how I feel when it comes to coming up with new material to write. Most of the time, I just can't find the words (or the time) to talk about things on a day-to-day basis.......I take those words back right now.

As summer comes to that final leg of August, I took another break on my journey, pulled out my roadmap, and started to contemplate my next step. And it occurred to me that even though I'm on this music experience of a lifetime, keeping true to my regular entries would be a great way to continue writing when I need a break from all the new music I have been pushing myself to listen to.

Yet summer has lingered on my mind lately......and all of the music that I tend to associate with it. Sure, it could be as simple as looking up some of the standard summer tunes people long to hear during this time, but I'm not just your average person. The summer is more than just the themes of the music. It's all about the attitude, the body of work, the feelings you get when you listen to the song. It's more than just drinks with umbrellas, a closet full of tank tops and shorts, and nights of digging your toes into the sand. It's a state of mind, a feeling from deep within, that relaxation and calm that comes with listening to the waves and smelling freshly fried funnel cake.

In summer fashion, I have thrown away structure (i.e., Top Ten) and focused on a variety of songs that I feel embody what I look for in summer music. So here are my top 13 songs that compliment my personal summer soundtrack.

Clair de Lune by Claude Debussy - A bit off what I would consider my musical expertise path, but one has not really lived until hearing this classic romantic period piece from Debussy. The instrumental themes in Clair de Lune build like the ebb and flow of the ocean waves.....gradually building, then growing to the climax before pulling back again. It reminds me of a wistful, dream-like experience, which is what summer is to most who relax and enjoy it.

Dream A Little Dream of Me by The Mamas & The Papas - I'll admit, when it comes to The Mamas & The Papas, it's difficult to pick just one song that embodies summer for me. Why is that? Because their West Coast style bears summery themes. Who else would talk about dancing and California with such passion and adoration?

The Escape by Rupert Holmes - I always find it amusing when people automatically draw a blank upon mention of this song. Yet when the chorus hits....just about every classic 70's rock fan will sing along....drunkenly, if possible. But this song is more than just about Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain. It's the story in the song. The way Holmes describes the characters falling in love all over again, even though they are not aware that they are responding to each other through the ad. It alludes to how a little bit of mystery in the relationship has brought back that spark that they once shared before it made them stray a little for something more exciting.

Better Together by Jack Johnson - What better way to incorporate summer themes into modern music? This Hawaiian native has been on the scene for over a decade or so, yet until recently (around the time of Curious George hitting theaters), Johnson became a household name. His catchy island-style rhythms & harmonies resonate throughout this song, almost reminiscent of the elusive summer romance.

Wouldn't It Be Nice by The Beach Boys - Another classic example of musicians who embody that summer/fun vibe through any of their music. The Beach Boys are iconic and popular for their song themes about girls, surfing, and cool classic cars. Yet instead of choosing one of those standard themes, I decided to go with something from their breakaway album Pet Sounds. It's just proof that it doesn't matter what the Beach Boys are singing about; their music will transcend and fit the mold any day.

La Mer/Verlaine by Charles Trenet - As part of my journey, these selections would be the first (two) songs that I would add from my own education. Branching out into new territory, I challenged myself with learning more about 1940's and 1950's French music....settling into the soulful, creature comforts of Charles Trenet. His voice oozes classic summer with a martini or glass of wine at a boat party on the French Riviera. A more sophisticated palate, but one that just seems so fitting on a night where the stars are out and the temperatures cool enough to open all the windows while sipping a glass of my favorite Pinot Noir.

Urge for Going by Joni Mitchell - Break out my inner hippie, Joni Mitchell has come onto the scene! I have always enjoyed her folksy singer/songwriter style....and this song is no exception. Whereas every once in a while I feel the need to be sophisticated, I also feel the need to put my toes in the grass, run in the rain, and feel the sun beat down onto my face. Mitchell captures that campfire acoustic vibe all too well.

Hotel California by The Eagles - Cue the epic masterpiece. While Hotel California really has no summer-style themes, it always seems to me that this is the one song that most patrons long to hear when they're at an outdoor beach bar. Originally about American decadence/hedonism and its downfall, Henley's voice captures the voice of the narrator perfectly in this ballad. You hear him talk about stopping at this hotel along the way, bleary-eyed and weary from his travels. Yet as he's there, the strange happenings begin to unravel before him and when he goes to leave, he finds that no matter what he does, he will never be able to fully put the hotel behind him....he has become a part of it.

Here Comes The Sun by George Harrison - I would be remiss if I didn't include this musical gem on my list. After all, a Beatles song is perfect for any season! But this one? Definitely a necessity for the summer......simply because it signifies the beginning of wonderful times ahead! When I think about the summer, I feel it's a time of refreshing one's soul, a time to put all that has happened behind you in order to move forward in life. A clean slate for what's to come......and it shall be exciting!

Stardust by Hoagy Carmichael - If you couldn't tell, I have a thing for older music. Just the way it captures innocence and beauty all within its melody......astounding. The vibe being reminiscent of a Great Gatsby-esque party, champagne and an evening gown. Or even just a nice bubble bath, with the candles lit.....and a nice chilled glass of Chardonnay. I consider it my more mellow selection of the summer, when one wants to just unwind and relax for a while.

You and I Both by Jason Mraz - Just like Jack Johnson, Mraz is an artist who is able to be considered a summer-style performer. Anything I could have suggested of his would be fitting for this list. Yet I chose this song particularly for the fact that it was the summer of 2003 the first time I had heard it. His guitar style is classic, his voice is light and clear, and his music makes me feel like being at the beach on a warm summer night. During the winter, when I need that summer boost, I can always rely on Mraz to take me back there....zeppoles not included.

I'll Be Seeing You by Billie Holiday - This is the true "lady" of music.......and her style can be adapted to fit any season! But I feel this fits in the idea of summer romance....when you're saying goodbye and knowing that you'll think of that person whenever you're around something that reminds you of them. Call me a hopeless romantic, if you will, but just popping in some Lady Day and dancing with your significant other, it's timeless.

The Door Into Summer by The Monkees - The only song on my list that mentions summer in it, but the most complex of all. For being known as a "boy-band" style of music, by the time their fourth album Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn & Jones, Ltd. was released, The Monkees had taken a more serious approach to their music and what they hoped they would produce. The chorus stands out the most to me, talking about the familiar things that remind us of summer....and how it all fades away once the summer is gone. Simple in meaning and melody.

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As I sit here reflecting back on this past summer, I cannot help but be filled with gratitude, love, joy, and above all else....a wonderful soundtrack to remember it all by.

~Jenny Rockstar

serving up a generous slice.......in retrospect

2010-08-17T00:19:00.000-04:00

I wanted to take a moment on this journey to take one step back into my collection......viewing something that I own, yet I now listen to with a more careful ear. It probably doesn't make sense as to why on my own path I would manage to reflect back onto a piece of work that I already own, yet let me explain.

While I was finishing up writing about Dylan last night, I kept thinking back to a moment during Matt's solo gig last night. As per usual, at any bar, you will have the local patrons who come to partake in tasty libations and want nothing more than to listen to some of their favorite classics performed live. This crowd definitely didn't disappoint. As Matt started to play the opening strains to Don McLean's "American Pie," this man who could've been my father walks up to him and poses the following question: What is the theory behind this song?

A simple question, yet it caught my interest just as quickly as it was asked. What was the true meaning behind this song? I knew that it referenced "the day the music died," when Buddy Holly, Richie Valens, and The Big Bopper died in that tragic plane crash on February 3, 1959. Yet what about the rest of the song? There was this epic 8 minute song that made more references to music than most people realize. I couldn't wait to get home to place the words in front of me, pull up Don McLean on my iTunes, and really analyze the song for its true artistic value.

And Don McLean is a pure genius for it! In so many words, he managed to capture the essence of the 60s in eight minutes. The allusions to Elvis (the king) and Dylan (the Jester), as well as Helter Skelter (Charles Manson) and The Beatles (the marching band & sergeants), just to name a few.......all mentioned within stanzas of one another. Or at least, this is the idea that many have created through listening to the song and discussing it through the years.

But it's more than just the people.....it's the moments captured. McLean recalling the moment he opened the paper and discovered that Buddy Holly had been killed in that plane crash. The summer of Charles Manson and Helter Skelter. The Great Space Race and the violent undertakings at Altamont. All prolific moments within the course of the 1960's that changed the face of the culture drastically.

Yet I can't help but wonder, what is the significance of "American Pie"? And why is she of such importance that she has the song named after her? Or maybe, just maybe, with all the musical reference and the sad moments captured, that "Miss American Pie" is not a person. Just maybe, it's a metaphor for the American Dream. For what many during this time had sought in their pursuit of life and liberty. Their slice of the pie, so to speak. While there is no real concrete understanding of what the song is truly about, since McLean refuses to explain the significance of the song to this day, taking one step back reminded me of yet another important lesson: listening to the words.

For so many people, we tend to just like a song for its catchy melody or the way it makes us feel. We bop along to it in the car, never paying any mind to what the song could be about. Yet sometimes, we all need to give a closer listen. There's more to be said for really listening to a song, but I think for now, I could use a slice of American Pie before I get to my next musical destination.

~Jenny Rockstar

an adventure in album appreciation.......

2010-08-16T02:44:00.002-04:00

When first contemplating who to ask for music, it dawned on me that throughout my life, I have surrounded myself with the best people to suggest music to me: musicians. While they may play originals or covers of other people's music, they must have their own influences that brought them to their current career. And so it became my initial step on the journey.

I could start from the first suggestions handed to me, yet I'd rather start with the first album that piqued my interest on the list. John, the bassist for Big Bang Baby, explained to me that good music to him is reflected in a body of work rather than in just a song or lyric. It's all about the big picture and not necessarily the one hit that made them famous. That being said, he placed Bob Dylan's Blonde on Blonde album on his quite lengthy list for me. And while I've never exactly listened to Dylan I decided to give it a whirl in order to understand a little more about album appreciation.

So on Friday night, with Matt away at his gig at Trump Plaza in Atlantic City, I pulled up the track listing for Blonde on Blonde and proceeded to put on my headphones, crank up the music, and immerse myself. Each song was placed through my trusty Google search engine as I located each track.....making sure that I followed the album listing to stay true to its form.

At first, I realized that no matter what song Dylan sings, he will always have this wavering tone to his voice. Originally, I used to find it kinda annoying. It would constantly have this sort of 'back and forth' motion to it, not a smooth consistency that most artists have to their voice. Yet as I moved past the first track and kept listening to the album itself, Dylan's voice became less annoying or grating.......in fact, I realized that his voice had its own rhythm. It reminded me of the ocean when I heard it, the way that the waves seem to move back and forth, rippling like sound. While at first one may feel a little agitated at hearing him sing, once you continue listening to Dylan, he tends to calm and soothe you, just like those ocean waves.

Secondly, I've also learned how above being a musician......Dylan is truly an amazing poet. Once you get through his voice and the melody, the words shine through. And they're different, spoken from a place that in all my years of writing, I've never been able to find. Who else can evoke such imagery from their words like he does? During my listening experience, I closed my eyes and I could picture the song, something very few artists have been able to accomplish in their career. Add in his voice and the melody, not to mention his classic touch of a harmonica, you have poetry in motion.

And just like John explained to me about focusing on the body of work, I listened in a similar fashion and found that more than anything else, Dylan is best observed when you put his work all together. If you want to focus on one song, that's just fine. True, you may find some songs are better than others, like how I feel "Just Like a Woman" stimulated my auditory senses more than "Stuck Inside of Mobile with the Memphis Blues Again." Yet when you can piece it together and listen in one continuous strand, it's even more epic in meaning.

Before starting this journey, I noticed that a lot of my music wasn't always in full album form. I tend to pick and choose certain songs from particular albums, not really focusing on what the album sounds like as a whole. In today's day and age, we tend to pick apart things to get to what we want, instead of giving everything else attention. I equate it to the equivalent of a really good ice cream sundae. Each component is delicious on its own, yet when you put all the ingredients together, you can appreciate and enjoy it as a whole.

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As always, I truly appreciate all the suggestions that have been sent my way. Who knows where my next adventure will take me? We shall see.

~Jenny Rockstar

breaking the project down.....

2010-08-14T13:14:00.000-04:00

So I've realized with my new project that this may be something that pushes me to write more blogs, which I am looking forward to. Because honestly, after receiving pages upon pages of suggestions, I have found that I don't quite know where to start when I begin the writing, yet when I do start........I doubt the education will stop! And balancing this with my school photography job, family and friend outings, writing and my never-ending support for my bf and his music.......I've placed quite the task in front of me.

But what is music? For some it's more than just words and melody and rhythm all jammed together. It's about an expression of your soul. Just like artists create visual masterpieces and writers string together jumbles of words to evoke emotion, musicians are able to aurally appeal to their fan base with their words and melodies dripping in emotion. I find that above all else, music speaks the words that we sometimes cannot. There have been several occasions where I fail to find the words to express my true emotions. (And for me to be at a loss, being a writer, that is a rather difficult feat.) What can I say? There are moments that the music I listen to can explain what's in my heart better than I can. Whether that emotion be love, anger, pain, happiness, peace, camaraderie..........there will always be a song to fill that feeling.

With that being said, do expect my first entry soon, as I am currently sorting through the mass of music that has been bestowed upon me. And yes, quite a bit of it will be going onto my iTunes when I have the funds to do so. There will still be several different entries, such as my top ten lists and random trains of thought.....can't just neglect the rest of my life for one single project!

And for those who have contributed from their collections......thank you. I've found some of your selections to be quite exquisite, sometimes mind-blowing! I'm looking forward to sharing my findings with my readers.

~Jenny Rockstar

P.S. - As a side note from my current findings, I do recommend Jeff Buckley........his music (covers and original) are beautifully executed.

taking you on my amazing musical journey........

2010-08-11T00:26:00.000-04:00

I've always heard it said that "the journey of a 1,000 miles begins with one step." I do have Lao Tzu to thank for those beautiful words, because they are more true than most people know.

Journey.
Such a simple word, yet differing in meaning for each person that thinks about what this word means to them.

Some people travel internationally for their journey, believing that seeing new places and different cultures will help them to understand the world better.

Other people keep it more local, seeking the solace of their roots to figure themselves out.

Some have a spiritual journey to seek deeper meaning to their life, while others have journeys in self-discovery through family history and their past.

Journeys can be found in every decision you make, every idea you create, and every moment that you take a chance to take risks.

As a change of pace, I've decided to go on a journey of sorts.......a musical journey. And as an added bonus, I get to take all of you with me. Why? Because I'm stuck in a musical rut at this moment and in order to get out of it, I need everyone's help. I have such an extensive music collection, yet I feel it lacks something. It describes me perfectly, full of several different types of music that I find interesting, well-rounded and eclectic to a fault. But where now? I have so much music that has been part of my journey......and I need more to complete it. In turn, I get to learn more about those who I encounter along my journey.

So I set out to pose a challenge to my friends and those around me, for those who know my musical tastes to push me into different directions with music they feel I would like or appreciate. A pretty simple request, I know, one that has given me quite a few pages filled with nothing but artists, songs, or albums that I must listen to now.

I've received such suggestions from rockabilly to classical, indie rock to techno rock, international to local fare. And while I indulge in these new musical ventures, I hope to take you, the reader, on my musical journey through my experiences while I listen to the music that will help compose my life's soundtrack. I think it'll not only help me find new music, but also have the chance to learn more about the people around me; to grasp a sense of who they are through what they listen to.

I have a feeling that this one idea is going to change my life in some huge way, so let's see where this particular journey takes me..........I'm ready.

~Jenny Rockstar

on the flip side.........

2010-08-10T00:58:00.000-04:00

Before iTunes became a hot commodity, I can remember walking into Best Buy or Sam Goody and purchasing many of the albums and singles I have today. Flipping through some of those singles, one of my favorite things was not listening to just the hit single that made it onto that CD or tape, but the second track that always managed to elude the top billing. Through years of listening to several of my favorite artists, I have found a love in giving the remainder of an album the opportunity to impress me........so far, I haven't been disappointed that much.

Fast forward to now, where many have the chance to download just the "B-Side" songs that they love, everyone is given the chance to break away from the hit single and understand why a big name artist can be called just that. Because it's not all about the big song on the album anymore. No......it's more about the body of work that they produce over their career. Whether it be good, bad, indifferent, a true artist is one who can give you something to listen to other than the songs that grace the radio waves. So as a fun break-away treat to top ten hits, I give you my favorite top ten B-Sides!

1) Tuesday's Gone by Lynyrd Skynyrd - The first time I had heard this song, it was in the movie Dazed and Confused. Skynyrd was always known for their big hits such as Free Bird and Sweet Home Alabama. Hell, even now, I can mention at least three or four popular cover bands that still play these songs today. And while I admit to loving the more favorable tunes, it was Tuesday's Gone that really grabbed me the most. It plays with the idea of a man losing the woman he loved, a story that just about anyone is familiar with. Yet the way L.S. makes it more personal by giving a distinct day of the week and really getting to the heart of the matter of the singer not being afraid admit the desire to be alone while they nurse their broken heart.......it's compelling. Furthermore, the instrumentation and musicianship that has been put into this song always brings close to tears any time it has come on my iPod or by some strange fate......or the radio.

2) Bell Bottom Blues by Eric Clapton - While this song may have been a single, this song was also a b-side to Layla, which is one of Clapton's most moving pieces in his musical career. But Bell Bottom Blues is an epic piece in its own right. Where Layla was all about Pattie Boyd Harrison and his love for her, this piece deals with the idea of unrequited love in its simplest of forms. Where most have dealt with the notion of loving someone that they couldn't be with, the words are, in essence, the most realistic. That very idea of loving someone so much that you would do anything they wanted you to do, but if they were to leave you completely, that they shouldn't be surprised by the idea that you could move on and find love again. We all talk about never feeling or loving anyone as much as we love certain people in our lives, but it can happen again. And Bell Bottom Blues gets to the heart of that, sharing with us that desire to be with someone we want more than anything in the world, yet knowing that with any love, when it is lost........it can be found again.

3) Dear Prudence by The Beatles - Yes.....I know that The Beatles are a force all their own. Any song that is mentioned on here would not be considered much of a B-Side.......considering that the Beatles catalog is something that is not exclusive on radio. Instead, I've heard many Beatles songs make it onto radio stations, even ones that were never released as actual singles. But I take this moment to give the band their due because yes, even their non-hit songs were just as note-worthy in their career. This one is no exception. Off their extremely lengthy and eccentric White Album, I can honestly say that this one is, by far, my favorite track. Written about Mia Farrow's sister, Prudence, who dedicated her entire stay in India to meditation so much that she missed out on being part of the group. And in turn, Lennon wrote this song for her as his own way of letting her know that they wanted her to be a part of the group and come out and have a good time with them instead of being a recluse. It is my go-to song for needing a simple pick-me-up during a stressful day......a reminder that there are other things going on around me and I should focus on them and have fun with life rather than lock myself away from the world.

4) We by Neil Diamond - It has become a tradition to hear Sweet Caroline at just about any bar that I go to.....it's a classic! Everyone I know can name at least that song when they hear the name Neil Diamond. But what about his other songs? I'm sure that if everyone really thought about it, they could come up with more than just one song by Neil that they're familiar with. America......I'm A Believer.......Hello Again.......all wonderfully crafted songs in their own right. But We takes the classic Neil we all know and love and turns him into an acoustic genius! Discovering this hidden gem on the soundtrack to Funny People, I found myself diving deep into the lyrical ocean of romance.......awed by its simplicity in words and meaning. Because in this particular song, Neil Diamond portrays love as more than just a one-way thing.....he gives it dimension and understanding. It takes both parties to make love work, not just you or me. But us.

5) When The Tigers Broke Free by Pink Floyd - For any die-hard fans of The Wall, this song is legend. Yet for those who are not familiar with the album and have only acquainted themselves with Pink Floyd's more popular hits, then I feel sorry for you.....because you have no idea on what you're missing out on! Broken up into two parts in the movie, When The Tigers Broke Free tells the story of how Pink's father was taken from him during the war. The way Waters paints this vivid picture of his father in the midst of combat and how the King signed the letter notifying his family of his father's death with a rubber stamp......it's moving in ways that one cannot even comprehend. You feel the raw, yet disconnected emotion within the words and the melody.

6) Ripple by Grateful Dead - Now this is a true B-Side, as it was known as one for the single Truckin'. I admit I am not the hugest fan of the Dead, but there a few signature songs that I can really get into......this one being one of them. What truly sets this apart from most songs is the way the song itself describes a person's life like a ripple in the water (of life): it is short and will eventually fade, but at least while it's there it makes an impact on the water.

7) Warning Sign by Coldplay - In its entirety, A Rush of Blood to the Head is one amazing album......I recommend this album to anyone who is looking for something intriguing to listen to. And yes, while there are many great hit songs on this particular album, Warning Sign is one that shakes me down to the very core. I can remember many nights of crying about stupid boys when I heard this song. The words talking about loss in a way where the person singing wants nothing more than to forget the loss and be back in their arms again. Whether it be about the loss of someone close to you or mourning the end of a relationship, the song always catches me in a way that no other Coldplay song can. It's looking for those signs that the end was near, but you couldn't find it.......and let's face it, how many of us have been in that position before? Quite a few.

8) Disenchanted by My Chemical Romance - There is definitely more to My Chemical Romance than just I'm Not Okay (I Promise) and this song is testament to it. Off the album Welcome to the Black Parade this is one song that has always grabbed me more than anything else MCR has released. From my own interpretation, I always took it as the idea that the person singing was talking about the idea of how they overcame adversity from their past and made it to the point where they view those who tormented them as lonely and unwanted. I distinctly feeling empowered by the melody and the words strolling through the streets of NYC to my travel filmmaking class after a wonderful night in the early stages of dating Matt and the world before me.

9) Einstein on the Beach (Waiting for an Eggman) by Counting Crows - Ever have one of those moments where you hear a song and it takes you back? Well, of course I wrote about this in my previous blog, but I saved this song for here, because Counting Crows are such an eclectic and charming band that just happen to have a lot of singles! Yet this song is such a rare track that I had to include it on this list. I can remember my friend Katie and her sister, Drea, in the car with me......and this song blaring as loud as possible through the speakers. Years later, I purchased the compilation Films About Ghosts (The Best of Counting Crows) and couldn't help but put this song on repeat, re-living the first day I had heard it and blaring it as loud as possible.

10) Cried by Hanson - So if you couldn't tell, I do actually like Hanson......ever since they came out with Mmmbop in 1997. I went to more than one concert, own quite a few of their albums, and thanks to my family, own quite a bit of memorabilia. When the song I Will Come To You came out as a single, Cried was the actual B-Side on it. The first time my friend Katie and I heard the song, we fell in love. It was catchy, it was something we could dance to, and most important, it was our favorite band singing it. And for those who still bash Hanson to this day, keep in mind that these three brothers started writing and performing their own music when most of us were still into Barbies and Hot Wheels. Now that is certainly impressive.

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I have always considered the B-Side as the under-appreciated music. Many of us can relate to feeling like that, wanting to take the spotlight, yet not feeling like we have the star material. But the best part about it all? Those who do appreciate it understand what makes it special......and makes it stand out above the ones that clamor for the spotlight.

~Jenny Rockstar

Thanks for the memory of things I can't forget........

2010-08-04T17:49:00.001-04:00

It was Oscar Wilde who once wrote "Memory...is the diary that we all carry about with us."

Wilde was definitely a very gifted writer and very profound in this statement, for it is our own mind and senses that help to preserve those memories that we carry on in our lives. For me, just the smell of a pack of Dentyne gum conjures up those memories of spending time with my Grandma Shirley when I was a budding young lady. The taste of chocolate-covered Pocky reminds me of those random movie nights with my friend Danielle in college. Even a mere glimpse at photographs of Central Park gives me the solace that I would get from walking around Manhattan.

But when it comes to music, my memories are the strongest. Most say it is scent, but when I hear a familiar song, I can piece together some of the most wonderful (or heart-wrenching) memories in my life. Just a few opening notes of a familiar tune takes me away to a moment as simple as brushing my teeth or as significant as the moment my senior year of college really hit me.

1) Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd: One of the greatest Pink Floyd songs has one of the simplest memories attached to it. I can remember standing in front of the mirror of the bathroom at Matt's house, brushing my teeth and getting ready to drive up North for work. Matt, as always, was awake (after 4-5 hours of sleep) and in a music mood. Picking up his acoustic, he serenaded me with some Elton John and Oasis.........but it was Floyd that stood out the most. Standing at the door of the bathroom, he started to strum this song and suddenly, it took on a new meaning for us. It was more than just a song at that moment. It was our relationship taking that next level and being some more meaningful than either of us could have ever imagined. Whenever Matt and the guys play it at a show, I am transported back to that moment. And yes, I even think about Colgate.

2) Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life) by Green Day: So yes, I associate this song with my ex-boyfriend in more ways than one would know, but this one is not solely about him. More importantly, I think about my last Drama Club showcase in my senior year. Our theme was the idea of growing up, set to song, dance, and acting numbers. For my number, I chose this song for the way that it talks about life and how no matter what, as long as you enjoyed it, it was worth it. It was the second to last individual number of the night before our group encore and as nervous as I was, I came out in my own attire, quote book in hand. Walking down the aisle and through the audience, I made my way to one of the front corners of the stage, plopping down and opening the book to a favorite poem of mine. In there, I tucked some familiar pics of my ex and friends, making sure to give a genuine, thoughtful smile before the song started. By the end of the song, I was in tears, moved by the moment.

3) 867-5309 by Tommy Tutone: Before Matt joined Big Bang Baby, I HATED when anyone called me Jenny. You can call me Jennifer, you can call me Jenn, but never had I been able to accept it when someone would call me Jenny. It was the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. When friends would attempt to call me Jenny, I cringed. Because, in all honesty, I didn't feel like a Jenny. But then came Big Bang Baby and before I knew it, I had inherited the nickname of........Jenny. And while on occasion I still do cringe at the nickname, it makes me smile knowing that even though it's not my preferred choice of name, that the boys from the band prefer to call me that. It's like their own personal nickname for me. Since this song is played at most of the shows I am at, I always feel like it's a reminder of just how much I consider these guys family.

4) With You In Your Dreams by Hanson: About 12 years ago, I lost my Grandma Shirley to lung cancer. To this day, it affects me almost as deeply as it did when I was 14 and in my freshman year of high school. During this time, my love for classic rock took a minor back-burner to my love of pop and boy bands. You name the band, I probably had their album. Yet in my freshman year, Hanson became my favorite band, despite all the ridicule I would get for listening to them. While since then I have found other bands to love, this one in particular I will always remember when I think of my Grandmother. Before she died, she gave me a Hanson t-shirt, along with a few glossy head-shots of them (courtesy of Eggo and their promotion at the time). Yet what makes this song stand apart is that Hanson wrote this song for when their own grandmother passed away. And so, when that fateful day came for me, I put that t-shirt on and played this particular track, crying as I listened to every word. Later on that summer, I got the chance to see them live and in the midst of one amazing show, this song came on. With my parents and friends around me, I cried, knowing that this was my grandmother's way of reminding me she was with me. Even now, I still get teary-eyed whenever I listen to this on my iTunes.

5) I Turn To You by Melanie C. - When I was a senior in high school, this song came out on the radio. Coincidentally, this was also the year I got my driver's license and started to give my friend & neighbor Manny rides home from school. Also a complete coincidence, just about any time we got in the car, this song would without fail, always come on in the car, whether it be on KTU or Z100. Manny and I always shared a laugh over hearing it and in time, would sing loud and proud to the song. When I graduated from high school, we lost touch as I went to college and immersed myself in lots of different activities with new friends. But even now, years later, when Manny and I seem to catch up, he'll give me that little reminder with a YouTube link or a line from the song.......and it will be like nothing has changed.

6) Twist and Shout by The Beatles - So imagine, if you will, my freshman year of college. I was starting to come out of my shell quite a bit in this year, making more friends and memories than I could have ever imagined. Then the Student Activities Director comes up to you and asks you to be a part of the Talent Show for Spirit Week. And in that moment, it's a chance to really break out and show the student body what you're made of. So in a black mini-skirt, one-shouldered purple tank, and knee-high black boots with fishnets, you're ready to take on the crowd! After several ballads, this is the chance to get the crowd up and moving......and your friends are ready to come out and help you! When that music starts, it's like something takes over you, urging you out into the spotlight as you belt it out just like John did when The Beatles covered this song. Before you know it, the crowd is up and out of their seats, screaming and cheering as loud as they can! And when the song is over, you've proven to the rest of the school that while you're usually quiet and reserved, you definitely know how to rock out! From that moment on, I made it a point to participate in as many Drama Club productions and Talent Showcases that I could be a part of.......because in this moment, I learned how incredible it felt to pull myself out of my shell and become who I am today.........Jenn.

7) No Rain by Blind Melon - While Big Bang Baby may cover this song now, I can remember being 9 or 10 years old the first time I heard this song. I remember that video distinctly as the bumblebee video. Just the opening strains of this song and I still smell the chlorine of my friend Mari's pool, the feel of the wind on my face from riding our bikes around the neighborhood, and the taste of a tall glass of refreshing iced tea. And most importantly, I can close my eyes and remember my childhood.......and how that summer began a tremendous change in my life. I was gaining more friends, breaking away from my parents (even though it was difficult), and learning more and more about the world around me. And sometimes, what I wouldn't give for the feeling of my clothes sticking to me after a good swim on a hot summer day.

8) Unforgettable by Nat King Cole - More than anything else, when I hear this song, I can close my eyes and still see my grandfather's face and the way he saw me peruse his music collection. I was an inquisitive six year old, plucking such gems as Tony Bennett and Frank Sinatra out from the small stack of cassette tapes. As the stereo played oldies and we talked about music, I can remember hearing the first few notes of Unforgettable and asking my Pop-Pop about this song. He then told me about Nat King Cole........and I became intrigued with this song. It was at this moment I knew that I wanted to learn the piano and become involved in music. In fact, the main reason I decided that music was my path was because I was determined to take lessons and figure out how to play this song. My Pop-Pop taught me a lot about life and how sometimes taking big risks (like divorce) can lead you to where you should be. Even now, at 26 years (8 years since the passing of my Pop-Pop), I hear this song anywhere and I'm taken back to one of the most defining moments in who I wanted to be.......tears to always follow.

9) Hear You Me by Jimmy Eat World - Although I do remember hearing the band perform this live, what really stuck out about this song is that when Matt and I were in the beginning stages of dating, my ex sent me this song on my phone....with him playing and singing the sorrowful ballad. The song was written for two fans who were killed in a car accident in Cali......and the band wrote a song mourning their loss. While I didn't lose someone to death, hearing this song was like mourning the end of the past four years of my life.........as I got ready to embrace the future that lay before me. So much had happened and this song made me feel like I could finally have closure on a huge chapter of my life. Every once in a while, when I hear this song, I can now smile knowing that whatever happened is over and now my life has really begun.

10) Because I Got High by Afroman - All of my other picks on this list have been meaningful in more life-changing ways. But this one? Not so much. The summer before starting college, my friends and I all got into the Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back soundtrack. Being cliche and being huge Kevin Smith fans, we would listen to that album over and over again, always quoting the dialogue tracks and singing along with our favorite songs! And while there were better songs on that soundtrack than this one, I remember this one the most, because whenever I close my eyes I can still hear the laughter and camaraderie that existed between all of us that summer. The night before I moved into school, we went to see this movie on its opening night, sharing in one final get-together before we all parted ways in the next chapter of our lives.

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It's important to have memories, even when you don't want to remember them. They give you the confidence to keep going (or to take a step back when re-assessing). The push in the direction you've needed to go. And if those memories come with a kickass soundtrack, then at least you have something to listen to while you remember.

~Jenny Rockstar

Conversation with my 16 year-old self..........

2010-07-22T19:15:00.000-04:00

Last week, as I was going through my Facebook feed, I took notice to a post that my friend Jina posted from John Mayer's blog. When I clicked on it, he discussed the things he would tell his younger self if he had the chance to do so.

Now, while I know that I need to live my life with no regrets and that I can't change what has happened, only how I look at it, if I ever had the chance to talk to a 16 year-old version of myself, I'd have plenty to say!

I spend so much time making music and celeb lists for fun, but I wanted to make a list of things I'd say to my younger self if I ever had the chance to talk to her:

1) What upsets you now will be NOTHING compared to the trials ahead. Dances, school papers, having a date on a Saturday night.......it's not as important as when you graduate from college and make it out into the real world. Having difficulty in choosing what outfit to wear when hanging out with friends will be a blip on the radar next to a job, paying bills, and taking care of yourself. And what happens when you have to worry about car expenses, how much toilet paper you have left, or whether or not you can afford certain necessities at the grocery store? The real world will be brutal and life will kick you in the ass, so just understand that the little trivial moments right now will hold no bearing on what lies ahead.

2) Love exists, even if it doesn't feel like it will be happening anytime soon. When you eventually date, there will be pain and heartache and it will feel like it's the end of the world. But it's not. The pain is merely a reminder that you have a heart and that you are feeling emotion.......even when you wish the pain would go away. Sometimes love fades and you have to make the hardest decisions when choosing what is right for you, but it's worth it in the end. Believe me, having your heart broken two months before your wedding really puts life into perspective.......and once you're ready, there will be someone who helps you forget what this felt like.

3) Popularity will become irrelevant with age. When you're younger, having as many friends as possible is looked at as a good thing, but not always. What's more imperative is that you find people who understand and like you for who you are, not what you own or what your parents make. It is better to count your best friends on one hand rather than just have a list of casual acquaintances.

4) Yes, there are still people who will act like they're still in high school. While many think that high school is over the second you receive your diploma, this is not always the case. Some will still re-live those days as though they were the most important moments in their life, even if it's only a stepping stone to what's really to come. You don't need those people in your life; their drama means nothing in your own goals and dreams.

5) Don't be afraid to branch out. When you get out in the real world, the only way to meet new and interesting people is to get outside of your box every now and then.

Rock that Talent Show in some sexy attire.
Participate in Wiccan rituals to learn more about different cultures & religions.
Find solace in a moonlight walk.
Drink underage at a dive bar with your friends.
Go to a few band afterparties and let go for a while.

Just don't stop living! You need something to tell your grandchildren when they ask you for wild & crazy stories of your life.

6) Things will blow over. No matter how many arguments or hardships come your way, it can always be worse than what it is. Give things time......everything will smooth over with some time and distance. Don't beat yourself up over a friendship that fades or a relationship that ends. It all happens for good reason and with the healing, everything will get better. Death is the only permanent in life.

7) Drama is stupid. Just know this, for you will encounter plenty of it! Many will try to drag you into their drama or involve you in things that will stress you beyond belief! But drama is something that is best left for the stage.

8) There is someone out there who will love you for who you are and who you want to be. Granted, there will be plenty of people who come through and offer the same, but what I mean is the person who you eventually end up with. They're out there, getting to you as fast as they can. You may find people who can temporarily fill that void, but to be with a person who loves the you that you want to be.......there's nothing more that one can ask for!

Someone who loves you when you're happy, sad, or in between.
Someone who handles your crazy when you try to regain sanity.
Someone who treats you with kindness and love, even when you feel you don't deserve it.
Someone who gives you the support in anything you want to do with your life, despite their own reservations about your dream.
Someone who notices those little quirks about you and loves them.
Someone who no matter what happens, wants nothing but your happiness in life, because that's what truly matters in life.

9) Never lose sight of your dreams. When you're young, you think that the world will just give you all the things you want, but that's never the case. The world is sometimes cold and cruel, never bending to the way you hope it will. But while you get beaten down, never lose that hope that you're going to make it, because you eventually will. It may take more time than you thought and your path may have a few detours, but everything happens in their own time.

10) Realize that the most important part of life is to never stop learning and growing. You don't need to be in school to keep expanding your knowledge.......you can discover new things without the use of a book or a classroom.

11) The whole world is not out to get you. While it may be difficult to give some people a chance, do try. Not everyone has malicious intentions with how they act towards you. That's not to say that everyone is with you (because there are douchebags who thrive on watching you suffer), but that even when you don't agree with how people act it doesn't mean that they don't do it without the best of intentions.

12) Don't always settle for the status quo. If you compromise yourself then you have let yourself down. Keep reaching for what you believe is right, because sometimes, you'll win.

13) Life happens for a reason. You won't know why some people walk out of your life while others walk in. You won't understand why you don't get the opportunities that you deem are the most important ones to take. All you can do is take life in stride and know that when one thing doesn't go right, it only means that something better is on the horizon.

14) Keep in touch with your family. They are the people who know you better than most. While you may feel that they can be unfair and out to get you, I promise that their intentions are nothing but honorable......even if you can't see that until you're older.

15) Above all else, make sure to take care of yourself, because in the end, you are all you've got. Sure, there are people who love you and are there to support you, but at the end of the day, you're with yourself. People can come and go, but you remain. So be sure to not beat yourself up too much, but do keep that inner critic to keep you motivated!

16) Ultimately, the key to life is just to be happy (and don't be afraid to share that happiness!) As long as you can do that, you've figured out the most important lesson of all.

~Jenny Rockstar