Before the band scene majorly factored into my life, one would be hard pressed to find me out at a show. In fact, one would be hard pressed to find me anywhere without my ex. As a West Point cadet, Kyle (my ex) always had to follow certain rules and regulations. I can distinctly remember one weekend where I waited nearly 90 minutes in a parking lot until he was released by his commanding officers. Needless to say, I was not happy about it, but I learned to adapt to these rules and regulations myself. It was almost as though I was living his lifestyle with him......only from outside the barracks of West Point.
In fact, I felt they were a COMPLETE waste of my time! A recent college graduate, engaged to my West Point sweetheart, I was ready to embrace being an Army Wife. I had no time to waste on frivolous things like going to the club or a bar for amusement. I had to worry about formals and deployment dates. It felt like living in a constant state of panic, because here I was, only 22 years old, having to worry about my fiancee never coming home from his deployment. While it was a little less than two years off, it scared me senseless. Never had I had to worry about adult responsibilities of this caliber. I was still focused on my new full-time job and making ends meet as I moved out of my house.
I was soon to find out post-West Point that my life was not going to go in the direction I had thought. Just after a year of being engaged and four years together, my ex ended our relationship while posted at Fort Sill in OK. There was no conversation, no interaction of any kind. Just a text message explaining that he did not feel the way a future husband should feel about his future wife. The pain in the end tore me apart in ways I refuse to re-hash here, but I know ended up better for me. I started to hang out with friends more and re-connect with the world I had come to let go of for so long. And when I started to go back to seeing cover bands, I felt at home.
As I learned, time changes perspective, people come and go, and even I started to respect and admire the musicians who took their time to play my favorite songs. In fact, if it hadn't been for returning to shows, I don't think I would have been dating my current boyfriend, Matt. That's him, kissing my face. Strangely enough, he's a cover band musician himself, performing in one of the biggest cover bands in NJ. I don't know where I would be if it had not been for his ability to remind me that while one door closes, another one opens right before you. I would not be the person I am today had it not been for him. Where my dreams in my previous relationship were encouraged then discouraged, Matt has always supported anything that I decided I wanted to do in my life and because of that, I've found my niche.