5.21.2014

Death is harder on those who are left behind....

Death is inevitable....but you can't plan for it.

And today, it spoke loud and clear of its intentions, as two people who I didn't know (but have heard plenty about through social media), lost their battles to cancer. Even though I heard of them merely in passing, death has always had a profound impact on me. I cry, I mourn in my own way, and today was no different.

The first was a boy who managed to warm the hearts of the cast members of The Walking Dead. His name was Mason and from what I read and watched, he was truly wonderful; you could tell that even in his final hours, the lightness in his heart was still there, never wavering. And while I only knew of him, his passing gave me reason for pause and reflection today.

The second was the wife of a former high school classmate of mine. She too, unfortunately, had lost her fight and within the Facebook post of a promising marriage, I read the heartbreak of a profound loss. I couldn't stop the tears from coming if I wanted to, even as I had to walk away from my desk and take a moment to compose myself. Lindsey, you too will be missed.

Death affects us all, whether we know someone or not, because their influence is left behind. When they pass, a piece of you goes missing that you can never get back. Sure, it will rebuild, but it's never the same. And none of us are safe from this, we'll all eventually have to learn how to rebuild, even if it feels like we'll never recover.  

On my way home, I rolled the windows down again on the drive to take in the beautiful day and when Matt came home today, I did the only thing I could do in a situation like this: I hugged him and I let the tears go. There's no sense in being scared of what will happen in the future. The more important thing is that we take the time to continue appreciating life in the now. Even if tomorrow brought sorrow, today is important. 

Today is where you pursue the impossible. 

Today is when you fight and prove just how strong you are. 

Today is opportunity.

Today is when you love

Today is how you justify all you stand for. 

Today is everything.

And in death, today is the day to keep pushing through, no matter how sad it seems. 

Jenn's Pursuit Playlist:

1) This is the New Year - A Great Big World
2) The Boys Are Back in Town - Thin Lizzy
3) You Are The Wilderness - Voxhaul Broadcast
4) Shadowboxer - Fiona Apple

~ Jenny Rockstar

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